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Created By

xashleyrosex

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<div style="border:1px #ccc solid; background-image:url('/images/ray.gif'); font-family:arial; width:200px; padding:5px;"><center><div style="font-size:20px;"><a href="/story/xashleyrosex/24904">we didnt used to be like this21</a></div><table><tr><td width="50"><div style="color:#2CC362; font-size:15px; padding-top:4px; background-image:url('/images/profratebg.gif'); background-repeat:no-repeat; width:44px; height:26px; text-align:center; font-weight:bold; vertical-align:middle; padding-top:8px; padding-left:1px; " valign="top">33</div></td><td><div style="height:100px;width:100px; padding-top:9px; background-repeat:no-repeat; background-image:url(/images/storyCover.png);"><a href="/story/xashleyrosex/24904"><div style="margin-left:9px; __padding:0px; height:90px; width:70px; background-repeat:no-repeat; background-image:url('http://www.testriffic.com/storyfiles/24904.jpg');"></div></a></div></td></tr></table></center></div>

+ 21	my abusive lover 159
+ 18	my abusive lover 158
+ 25	my abusive lover 157
+ 31	my abusive lover 156
+ 36	my abusive lover 155
+ 27	my abusive lover 154
+ 30	my abusive lover 153
+ 27	my abusive lover 152
+ 27	my abusive lover 151
+ 29	my abusive lover 150
+ 26	my abusive lover 149
+ 30	my abusive lover 148
+ 21	my abusive lover 147
+ 10	crushed.
+ 14	>all my fans please read
+ 6	i miss you:[
+ 22	my abusive lover 146
+ 10	first girl
+ 28	my abusive lover 145
+ 7	i need...

          "Just get away from me Luke," I said through gritted teeth, when I was able to talk again. "I'll be out of here by morning, probably sooner." I grabbed the table and pulled myself up.
          It made me sick to look at Luke, partly because of what he did, and partly because there was still a part of me that loved him, and desperately wanted to forgive him. But I knew if I did, I would never be able to live with myself. I couldn't do that to Zach.
          I trudged into the dark bedroom, my second attempt that night to get my things packed. I threw all my stuff into bags, and gathered all the money I had been saving. I didn't know exactly where I was going to go, but I knew it was killing me to stay here.
          "Myra," Luke begged. "Myra, please, just try to understand!"
          I jerked my head around, my heart throbbing with hurt. "Try to understand?" I whispered. "Try to understand what Luke? That you killed my best friend, but you only did it because I had a few bruises?" His face was pale, and it looked like he was going to be sick.
          I hated to admit it, but it killed me to see him hurt that way. I turned away, and went back to packing my things. I could hear Luke's soft cries behind me, and pain stabbed my heart. I started to try and comfort him, but guilt took over, and I remembered looking down at Zach's bloody body, tears streaming down our faces as he took his last breath.
          That gave me the extra strength I needed to leave. I picked up my things, and got up. "Do you want to take my car?" he asked. I looked at him with disgust, and shook my head.
          My heart shattered as I shut the apartment door behind me and hung my key on the knob. I walked out of the building, clutching my bags tightly, not daring to look back. I only had to walk a few blocks before I came to a hotel, and decided I might as well rent a room.
          The hotel was very shabby. There were stains on the carpet and rips in the wall paper, but at least it was somewhere to stay. I set my bags on the floor and locked the three big metal locks on the door behind me. I longed to be back in the apartment; I was terrified of being alone.
          I sat down on the orange bed spread and lay down, completely exhausted. I could hear the faint squeaking of bed springs in the room next to me, and I put a pillow over my face, trying to drown out the sound.
          I closed my eyes tightly, trying to think of someone to call, someone I could stay with for a few weeks. I couldn't think of anyone, and I was to tired to keep trying.
          I lay there in misery, thinking, "What now?" Should I call the police and turn Matt and Luke in? Or has it been to long for a phone call to matter?  I tried not to think about how badly I wanted someone to be there holding me and telling me everything would be ok. Zach, Luke, Matt, anybody, it didn't matter anymore. I just needed someone to comfort me.
          I pulled the ugly orange blankets up to my chin and curled up into a ball, trying not to think anymore, trying to let myself just fall asleep.

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