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xXcaitlin13Xx

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"Wow, guys im sorry. I am really sorry." I said to nicholl and caitlin. "I cant believe my dad. I cant believe this. This game of life has finally won. Its torn me down." I got some tears in my eyes. "Harley, were like your family now. Its okay." Nicholl said to me. "Harley, life is gonna be hard from here on out until we get this whole thing done with. ANd it may last a while. But you have to be a big girl. AND take what life throws at you and then spit back 10 times harder. You get me?" Caitlin said to me. "Caitlin. You dont get it. Everyday i find a war against myself. I hate the way it is. I hate how i cant defend for myself. I can take this. I have lost close to everything. I have honestly almost nothing. But you know. I guess this doesnt matter. This game got my ass. And i am not gonna catch up." i said now tears were going down my face. "Gods laughing isnt he..." I said when no one else could say a word. "No, god isnt laughing at you. Hes just trying to help you." Nicholl tried to say without tearing up. "Hes only watching out for you." She managed to finish. "Yeah, well he isnt doing a good job!" I freeked out and yelled. "He never tried to help me before.. so why is he starting now!?" I yelled. " I just dont get how i have nothing. And Kyle has everything. Like he is the one who hasnt sinned. Or done anything wrong. He isnt the one who is now dis-owned. Hes the prince in the kingdom. And im the kings slave." I said. 'harley, that isnt true. Hon, its all okay. Its going to get ruff but thats what we gotta do un order to get what we want. and thats your protection." Nicholl said. Now wiping the tears away. "Hars, i dont want you to be sad. I dont want to see you like this. I love you like your my other little sister. I mean.. your so special. Your not the slave your the princess, hes not the prince hes the slave. And you'll order him to death." she laughed at herself for saying that Then i laughed a little bit. Not believing she was making any sense. "Well then why do i feel like im the only one without anything here. I have nothing." i said. "Harley, you have us." Caitlin said. "Remember when you used to say  that i should live my life the best way that i could?" Caitlin asked me. "Yeah i remember. And thats when you stopped cutting. I helped you." i said. With a smile on my face. I helped her. WHen she was at the lowest she could be. I got to her. I helped her out of depression. "Thanks." i said then turned around to walk upstairs to my room. "I need some time alone to think about stuff." i said. then walked up the stairs.

4 hours later.

"Where are the sharp objects?" I was wispering to myself. I knew it wasnt right. But i needed to feel some pain from myself. Pain that could help me feel a little bit better. At least. I found a pocket knife. And made a small gash in my upper leg. i started to cry. I let the tears run down and as they fell off my face they mixed with the blood rumbling above the skin. How could i be doing this. Little harley, the one who was never late to class. I loved school. I was sucha good girl. i had everything i wanted until my mom had to leave. i wish she would have never died. She wouldnt of wanted this. i know she would have done anything to keep me safe. Then i decided to just cut my arm. I took a strong hard slit. THen i pulled my hoodie sleave down and thought about sleeping. "Harley.. hey dinner is ready if you wanna eat. Are you okay?" Caitiln said knocking on my door, "uhh, yeah be down in a second. Thanks." I said back. Then got up to walk down stairs i took the plate of food and ate as fast a i could. Then went back to my room. Without a word. I went to the bathroom looking for the niquil. "Maybe i will take 5 nyquil Maybe i wont wake up again." I wispered to myself. "Only if im lucky." I said again. out loud. After raidin the pill cabinet for 5 minutes i saw the bottle of sleeping pills. I pooored out a handful of nyquil popped them in my mouth then took some big drinks of my milk. Went and layed down on my bed.. and just thought about tomorrow. And what i used to be. Then i started to fade out.

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*Jae