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Ravenwood Manor (Intro) |
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The Blank Canvas (9)
Romance
 Created on 5-29-08
 Views(185)
 Story Rating G
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My whole face went blank at the sound of the woman’s words. No emotion seemed to flicker in my eyes and I could see Aubrey shaking nervously as she waited for my reaction. I could say no words; I could not even mouth them, nor think them.
Aubrey’s words sounded like gibberish as she conversed with the old woman who had spoken the words that had twisted my body. The night suddenly came pulsing alive and the cold words hissed their way into my brain.
Where is your ring, pet?
Ring.
Aubrey. Was. Either. Married. Or. Engaged.
“Olivier?” Her soft voice came out in a gasp as I finally regained the feeling in my arms. I then realized that she had been shaking my shoulder violently.
“What?” I too could hear the flat bitterness that whipped out harshly from my throat.
“Please, let me explain…”
“Explain?” I sneered. “Explain how you led me on? How you made me think silly thoughts? How you played with my heart?”
I shoved off her groping hands as I trudged off of the balcony and back into the main room. People paid little attention to me which was just fine because I would prefer not to make a scene. I heard her clattering footsteps behind me but I didn’t bother to look back.
I knew that below the anger I was bleeding from the inside and that there would be excruciating consequences when I was at home alone. I just hope I am not pathetic enough to curl up in a ball and cry, but I knew I easily could.
Pushing through the front door, I suddenly felt a tight but meek grip on my arm. I didn’t even have to guess to who it would be. I faced the heartbreaker and noticed a lone tear streaming down her left cheek.
“Please understand; I need you to understand.” She pleaded after closing the door behind her.
I said nothing and she seemed to use my silence to her advantage and once again opened up her mouth to speak.
“He has been a friend of mine since childhood and we were always sweet on each other. I have always loved him and he has always loved me. He proposed to me just a month before I met you… you see when I first met you I didn’t know what to think. I thought you were just going to be a stranger who was going to draw me, but then something else happened. I got scared. I didn’t know what to tell him when I came home that night.
“I will be frank with you; I believe I have fallen in love… with you. But I can’t just leave him I still have feelings for him and I know he loves me terribly, and you can’t just do that to someone you care so much for.” Aubrey explained but once again I stayed silent.
I noticed her nails digging into her arm as she waited in anticipation for me to speak but I kept my gob shut.
“Say something!” Aubrey begged once more.
“What would you like me to say?” My voice sounded disconnected and strained, as if I was hard time trying to speak. Which wasn’t surprising since it did seem difficult. “I… I love you too. Doesn’t that matter? All I ever see is you and it kills me to know… that… you will never be able… to be… mine.”
I suddenly realized that we were not only talking but walking aimlessly.
“I want you too, I just can’t. I am so sorry.” Aubrey abruptly shoved away from me and ran away in tears.
I wanted terribly to run after her but it seemed as though my legs were not strong enough to pull me forward, nor was my heart. I watched her run, I watched the greatest woman I have ever met run away from me.
I exhaled heavily and tried to picture what must be going through her mind at the moment.
Okay, so right now I am Aubrey—well mentally…
So I have this childhood sweetheart. I love him and he loves me. Years later he proposes to me and I say yes. A month or so passes and I meet this sexy…er scratch that… this stranger at a pond. At first I think of him as kind and sweet but after a while, when he begins to draw me, I start feeling things; things that shouldn’t be felt by an engaged woman.
I then begin to realize that it is love and I am now feeling guilty because I do not want to break either of their hearts. So I begin to lie, deceive and betray both of them, but in the end it just blows because I know I am not able to love two people terribly at once.
Ugh.
I shook my head a bit to get back into my own mind. I am pretty sure that her mind is not as simple as I had made it, but it was enough to get me back on track.
I looked in the direction that she had run in and decided that that would be a good place to start.
I ran; not knowing what to do or even what to say.
Buildings whirled past me like large shadows as I swept the streets in search of the fair maiden. The shoes that I had picked to go with the suit began to eat away at my ankles so I kicked them off and kept on going. The harsh cobblestone didn’t bother me as much as the uncomfortable shoes so I was okay with the situation.
A few blokes raised their eyebrows at me as I whizzed past them and a few even snickered, but I gave them no attention. I was too preoccupied in finding Aubrey.
I don’t know how long it had been when I finally heard the first of her sniffles, but once I did I easily spotted her out. She was sitting under a large tree with her knees pressed against her chest and her hair flowing wildly out of its bun in the wind.
She caught my eye but our moment didn’t last long for she had quickly looked away.
“Look, I understand what you mean, but I guess I tend to be a jerk.” I apologized as I cautiously moved beside her, waiting to see if she’d push me away, but she didn’t.
“It’s not your fault, it’s mine.”
“So what’s his name?” I tried not to sound envious but that didn’t work out real well.
“Laurence,” she replied quietly. “Oh I’ve made a real mess of things!” Aubrey’s voice broke twice as she shoved her sobbing face into her palms.
To comfort her I wrapped my arm around her shoulder and gently rocked her a bit. I may be disappointed, but that is no reason to not be a gentleman. Of course the truth was pulsing throughout my body with an agonizing pain that seemed it would never go away, but that didn’t stop me from feeling slightly happy about being so close to her.
“He loves me… and… I” Aubrey could not complete her sentence because she was once again interrupted by her uncontrollable blubbering. Her sobs shook her whole body and I began to feel a bit of pity for her.
It made it a little easier for me to control myself too because I liked knowing that I wasn’t the only one in pain. I don’t mean that I like either one of us in pain; I just like how I am not alone and that she feels just as strongly about me as I do for her.
“I love you too,” I heard her quietly add.
“I feel the same way,” I was careful not to mention the word love because I felt so knotted up and that I could just explode from all the agony.
The rest of the night was tainted for the both of us as I held her in my arms while she cried. But what I remember the most was when she abruptly began to laugh.
“I bet I look like a total mess.” She said through chuckles and I snorted.
“You could never look like a mess.”
“Oh please.” I noticed a small blush across her cheeks and I almost smiled in spite of it. “Oh, Olivier, I don’t know what to do!” The tears came pouring back to her eyes.
“I don’t either,” was all that I could think of to say because it was her decision, not mine. My answer didn’t help her one bit, but I figured it wouldn’t have whichever way.
“I am so sorry,” she apologized before drifting into a deep sleep.
And there I sat with the beauty in my arms, not sure whether to be sad or happy. Or if I should be heartbroken or smitten.
(Author's Note: I am not sure if it is the fact people are just not going on this site or if I truly am losing fans...
(I started off with 20 or up rating but now it is falling below 15... I just hope it doesn't go below 10)
(I will not end it because I really do want to finish it; I just wish the rating wouldn't dwindle so low...)
(So please RATE!)
(P.S. sorry about the rate hounding but I do think that we all love rates...)
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