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Created By

roxy957

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<div style="border:1px #ccc solid; background-image:url('/images/ray.gif'); font-family:arial; width:200px; padding:5px;"><center><div style="font-size:20px;"><a href="/story/roxy957/4999">Anxiety</a></div><table><tr><td width="50"><div style="color:#2CC362; font-size:15px; padding-top:4px; background-image:url('/images/profratebg.gif'); background-repeat:no-repeat; width:44px; height:26px; text-align:center; font-weight:bold; vertical-align:middle; padding-top:8px; padding-left:1px; " valign="top">4</div></td><td><div style="height:100px;width:100px; padding-top:9px; background-repeat:no-repeat; background-image:url(/images/storyCover.png);"><a href="/story/roxy957/4999"><div style="margin-left:9px; __padding:0px; height:90px; width:70px; background-repeat:no-repeat; background-image:url('http://www.testriffic.com/storyfiles/4999.jpg');"></div></a></div></td></tr></table></center></div>

+ 4	To Live in the Present Again
+ 4	Anxiety

I am in there somewhere, longing to be free, hoping to shine at my full potential.  But you won’t let me.  Where did you come from? Was it my career choice and the overwhelming city of Los Angeles?   Was it my misconceived body image and my obsession with diet and exercise that introduced you into my life?  Was I being too hard on myself?  Was I pushing myself too hard?  Whatever it was, you latched on to me and dug your heels in so deep that nothing I did was enough to break free from your powerful grip; the grip that took over my life and led me toward darkness and despair.  Couldn’t you see that I was trying?  Couldn’t you be sympathetic to my hopes, dreams and desires?  Didn’t you see that I was on my way to something fabulous?  I tried to fight you, but my weapons weren’t strong enough. I got worse and worse and you became a bigger and bigger threat to my sanity.  I was stuck in a vicious cycle and was rapidly spiraling out of control to the point that I couldn’t take it anymore.  I was forced to fight you with the weapon I was so adamantly avoiding.  I naively thought I was winning the battle, but you keep creeping back into my life when I least expect it.  Now I know that I’m not even close to winning.  I’m not even tied.  Go away!  Leave me alone.  I’m starting to feel better and you’re ruining it for me.  Can’t you see you’ve done enough?

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