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  My pocket started vibrating. I pulled my phone out, the block letters read MARIE. I didnt really want to answer. She and Lydia, Kimber, and Yvonne were probably wondering where the hell I was. They werent the best of friends, but they were all I had. Along with Anthony and Chris. That was my little group. Marie, Lyd, Kim, Vonny, Anthony, and Chris. Ofcourse we hung out with other people, and most of them had other friends. But usually it was us 7 that hung out together at lunch. Lydia and Chris were dating, and always holding, and kissing. More then any couple should really. Espicially at our age. Thats one thing I didnt need to be around, it made me feel worse.

"Hello?" I asked quietly.

"Hey Zo, where the hell are ya?" blabbed Yvonne.

"Vonny, why are you on Maries phone"

"Whats wrong?" she asked. My sadness had obviously came out in my voice.

"Nothing," I said normally.

"Oh, well we are walking through Acacia Park. You didnt show, so meet us at Pita Pit."

"Uh...not today. I have stuff to do, sorry I didnt call."

"No problem, see ya in Math." and she hung up.

"Can't say goodbye?" I mumbled to myself.

  I loved my group, for one reason. It gave me someone to talk to and walk with. That way, I wasnt completly alone. But I was the outsider. The other girls had eachother sleepover, and they went to the mall. I was never invited any where. But, it could be worse. I flipped my phone close, and for a second I had the urge to through it as far as I could. After placing it back in my pocket, I layed on my side, then on my back. There were pieces of the cloudly sky peeking through the branches. Hopefully it would rain. I love the rain. I jumped as my pocket began to vibrate again (sorry if that sounded perverted.). The caller ID read, Angela. Why would she call me? The only reason I had her number was because she was at lunch with us the day we all exchanged numbers.

"Hello?"

"Zoey?"

"Yeah."

"Hey, I was wondering if you had Anthonys number."

Ouch. Was that the only reason she called? Becuase she wanted someone elses number? I gave it to her, then hung up and cried some more. I don't know why, but that call made my day %100 worse then it already was. Actually I do know why. I'm not a phonebook! Infact, I only have about 10 numbers in my phone, not including my parents numbers. And even if I did have more, would that be the only reason people call me. Actually, the only time any of my "friends" call is when they need somethiing, like the homework assignment, or like today when I wasn't at lunch. What had life come to? Basically, a big pile of shit.  Why wont God kill me? Why? Why does God kill those who don't want to die, and leave those who do, suffering.Is there a God?

There I go agian, questioning my faith. It's not like my family goes to church, but we are Christian. I'm not trying to be all religious now, everyone believes what they believe. And I respect that. I was feeling worse and worse by the second, so it all came out in more tears. I didn't feel like going back to school, not now. Both Courtney, Blake, and Courtneys best friend Jessica are in my 5th period. And Blakes in my 7th. Niether of those classes had any of my friends in them. In 6th, I had Tori. She was another of Courtney's buddies. I say Courtney makes my life horrible, but its the whole group. There's no boss, or whatever...not like those movies, where one girl practically controls the others. It's just that Courtney started it all. She has hated me ever since 5th grade when I told the teacher she was the one who put gum on the teachers chair. And none of the other girls would have done anything if it werent for her. Atleast Tori never caused problems for me.  She just acted like I wasn't there. If I survived freshman year, I could survive sophmore year right? It's only the third day of school, but it feels like three weeks. I.Want.To.Die. Simple as that.

  It was 12:04, and lunch ended at 12:12. I reluctantly picked up my backpack and trudged off to cross the creek. I got through the rest of the day alright, Courtney kept her mouth shut during 5th period Spanish. And Blake never talks to me or about me anyway, so I didn't have to worry about that. In math we had to pick partners. Ofcourse Yvonne chose Ellie, so I was all alone. It ended alright though, becuase this guy Kenny was alone, and he's cool. After walking home from my bus stop I flung off my shoes and backpack, and layed in bed for the next hour, thinking about having a great life. More like dreaming, not thinking. I finished my simple history notes, ate dinner with the family. Mom, Dad, My 12 year old brother Zach, and my 8 year old sister Zaina. (what can I say, my parents favor the letter Z) Then off to bed I went, hoping to never wake up.  But as always, I did.

The next few days went alright. No problems really, except for the fact that I felt emotionally horrible. But hey....what can I do?  Life is life. During the weekend I pretty much slept. I had no idea of the surprise waiting for me on monday.