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“Ok.” Hayley answered as she looked down, not quite able to meet his gaze.

“Ok, what?” Brennan asked, unsure of what she really meant.

Then doubt began to creep in, clouding her once sure decision. She realized she could take back her answer, and say that she wanted to stay with him, but another part of her, the logical side, began to see all the complications such a choice would create. She looked back up at him and opened her mouth to tell him that she wanted out, but found herself unable to say the words. Everything within her resisted it.

Brennan looked at her, beginning to realize the struggle her silence indicated. “It’s ok. It won’t hurt my feelings. I’m not so fragile that you have to protect me. The next town is in about forty miles. I’ll drop you off there.”

Hayley felt a weight begin to settle in the center of her chest. Something about it just didn’t feel right, but she ignored the feeling, grateful that he had verbalized her choice when she couldn’t. “Ok.” She whispered.

“Don’t look all glum on me. Everything is fine.” Brennan said as he squeezed her hand in his. Then speaking under his breath he mumbled, “It’s better this way anyway. It’s not like I could ask her to leave everything and everyone behind to run off with a fugitive.”

It was obvious from the way he worded it, that Brennan hadn’t intended for her to really hear it, so she pretended that she hadn’t noticed, though all the while her mind kept mulling over what he had spoken.

“We’re here.” Brennan’s voice cut into her thoughts.

She glanced up to see that they had pulled up to a gas station. This one seemed fairly new, and big. The exterior walls were made of sandstone brick and a bright orange and black sign above the front double doors proudly had the words, ‘Flying ‘J’’ printed across it. A small restaurant was attached to the side of the building and several huge semi-trucks off to her left were pulled up to diesel pumps. “Yeah, looks like it.”

Hayley tried to feign indifference to her impending departure, but her behavior betrayed her intentions. Even the dullest of persons could plainly see she was upset by this turn of events. Brennan opened the door, and pulled his keys from the ignition before stepping out onto the hard concrete ground. “You getting out any time soon?”

“Yeah.” Hayley scooted across the seat and hopped down to the ground next to Brennan. He stood less than a foot away, and she couldn’t help but notice his close proximity. She looked up and was startled to find desire for her reflected in his eyes.

“What do you say to a quick afternoon meal before you go?” Brennan asked quietly as he reached out to grasp her hand in his, then paused and abruptly dropped his hand to his side. Though Brennan said nothing about this simple action, the gesture was explanation enough. No holding hands anymore, she was leaving. The harshness of this truth left Hayley feeling that she had just lost something, though she couldn’t define exactly what it was.

“Sure. Why not?”

“Ok. Let’s get going then.” Brennan said as they walked side by side into the restaurant. Brennan held the door open for her, and she murmured a thanks as she walked through the entry way. The restaurant reeked of cigarette smoke and Hayley figured if the walls weren’t painted a subdued brown, they would have been tinted yellow from the nicotine that hung in the air like an invisible blanket.

The waitress greeted them with a warm and friendly hello. “I’m Erin and welcome to Eddie’s Diner. I’m going to be your waitress for today. If you’ll just come this way, I’ll have you seated in just a minute.”

She showed them to a booth in the corner. Brennan and Hayley sat down across from each other, and the waitress placed two menus on the table before them. “Here you go. Now the special today is the Caesar salad with homemade potato soup for $4.95. Would you like anything to drink today?” The woman looked to be in her late thirties, with mousy brown hair swept up into a messy bun on the top of her head, though some of her hair had come down and was floating around her head like a wispy halo. Her face was tanned, and the hard line of her jaw and the presence of deep crow’s feet around her eyes spoke of a life that had been difficult, but she had a pleasant demeanor, and it seemed that the intricacies of life hadn’t managed to suck from her the caring nature that she had been evidently blessed with.

“Sure. I’ll have some water if that’s all right.” Hayley said, speaking first, her head buried in her menu already.

“I’ll take some Pepsi.” Brennan said, flashing the waitress his incessant smile.

She blushed slightly taking his grin as interest in her. “Ok. A water and a Pepsi coming up. I’ll be back soon to take your orders.” As she turned to leave, an extra spring in her step, she gave Brennan an extra smile and unconsciously swept back a loose strand of hair from her face.

“So what are you going to have?” Brennan asked after Erin had left their table.

“I’m not sure.” Hayley replied, focusing on the menu like her life depended on it. “I’m thinking maybe the special. How about you?”

“Probably the bacon cheeseburger and some fries. Places like this usually have great burgers.”

“Yeah.” Hayley answered, not really listening, she was so intent on the menu. In a few minutes Erin came back and took their orders. She gave a longing glance at Brennan, which made him smile all the more in amusement.

“Ok, that will be up in a few minutes.” Erin took the menus and turned back towards the kitchen.

Erin turned the corner and out of site, leaving a deep silence in her wake. Both knew their time together was coming to a close, but instead of filling the air with the words they were thinking, silence reigned in the atmosphere of the restaurant. Erin came back with Hayley’s soup and the rest of their food came after about twenty minutes; Erin placed their plates in front of them and they began to eat.

“Enjoy your meal.” Erin said continuing to gaze at Brennan.

Brennan grinned back at her, enjoying the attention. “Oh don’t worry, I will.”

 Hayley scowled, feeling annoyed at their flirtation. Finally after several seconds of blatant staring and smiling, Erin straightened up and walked back to the kitchen.

“What was that?” Hayley asked Brennan.

“What?”

“You know. You were flirting with her. She must be at least fifteen years older than you.”

“What do you care?”

“What do you mean by that? Of course I care.”

“And why?”

Hayley took a deep breath, trying to calm down, and responded with a slight tremble in her voice. “Because.”

“Right. Well as stimulating as this conversation is, I’m going to eat my food now.” Brennan grabbed his burger with both hands and took a big bite.

Hayley glared at him for a few seconds then looked down at her food. She pushed the limp lettuce leaves around her plate. Though just a minute before she had been starving, her appetite had suddenly disappeared. She stabbed a leaf and a crouton with her fork and took a bite, but as she chewed she couldn’t seem to get the food past her throat. She swallowed hard, forcing the masticated food down her throat.

After a few minutes of attempting to eat, she pushed her plate way and took another drink of her glass of water. The soup that she had eaten earlier was beginning to disagree with her, and she took a breath to collect herself, hoping she wouldn’t throw up again. She had done enough of that already.

Brennan looked at her, an unreadable expression on his face. He spoke with a touch of annoyance in his voice. “Finished?”

“Yeah, I think so.”

“Ok.” Brennan said. “You want to leave the tip if I pay for the food?”

“Sure.” Hayley mumbled as she pulled a wrinkled dollar bill from her purse and placed it on the table. “I’m going to go call my mom now. Do you see a pay phone anywhere?”

Brennan pointed to the entryway to the restaurant. “Over there. Duh. I’m going to go pay.” Brennan gave her another strange look and walked over to the register.

Hayley went over to the pay phone and got out her coin purse. She started dialing the 1-800 number for long distance, then her mom’s number, and put in the correct change. The phone rang three times before her mother’s voice came on the phone.

“Hello?”

“Hi Mom.” Hayley said, tentatively. “It’s me, Hayley.”

There was a pause on the line, and for a moment, she feared she was just going to hang up on her. Finally, there was a response. “Hayley. I haven’t heard from you in a long time.”

“Yeah. I know. It’s been awhile. Um…Mom?”

“Yes?”

Hayley wanted to just ask her to come pick her up, but she lost the nerve and changed the topic to something else. “So, how have you been?”

“Oh, busy. The church is really growing. Our numbers are up 5%.”

“That’s…great Mom.” She paused, trying to get the courage to as the question. “So Mom…what are you doing today?”

“Well, I have Ladies Bible Study at 3:00, then Wednesday night potluck at 5:00, and then service starts at 6:45. Why? Did you want to come? Oh, Hayley it would be so great to see you here tonight.”

Hayley closed her eyes for a moment to collect her thoughts. This wasn’t going the way she had hoped. “No, Mom, I can’t come tonight.”

“Oh.” Her mom’s voice cooled considerably. “Ok.”

“I guess the reason why I called is because I was wondering if you could come pick me up.”

“Pick you up? Isn’t your car working?”

“No, it broke down. I’m in a town called Buffalo.”

“How did you get to Buffalo?”

“I decided to take a spontaneous trip.”

“Derek called. He said you two talked together a few days ago.”

“Why did he call and tell you that?”

“Because he cares about you honey.”

“Ok…anyway. Can you come and get me?”

Another pause ensued, as both women waited for the other to speak. Finally her mom spoke. “Well, I’m pretty busy tonight, and I have a lot of errands to run tomorrow.”

“Forget it. I’ll talk to you later Mom, bye.” Hayley sighed and prepared to drop the phone back in its cradle, but before she could, her mom spoke again.

“Wait. Hayley.” Her mom said with a hint of desperation in her voice.

“Yes?” Hayley paused, placing her phone back on her ear. She imagined her mom saying she was sorry, and would drop everything to go get her right away.

“If you need a ride, the earliest I can be there is sometime tomorrow afternoon. I’ll just have to get my errands done later.” Hayley could hear the frustration in her mom’s voice. The realization that her mom found it difficult to choose between getting groceries and picking up her daughter from the middle of nowhere had left her feeling ever sicker than she already felt.

“No, it’s ok Mom. I’ll just find a ride with someone else.” She felt the tears beginning to form at the back of her eyes and she blinked hard to hold them back from fully forming.

“But who?”

“A friend. I’ll be find you go do your stuff.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. I’m sure.”

“Well…ok, if you’re going to be ok.”

“Yeah.”

“Ok.”

Yet another bout of silence entered the conversation.

“You know, I could ask Derek to come instead.”

Hayley wanted to scream at her mom. That’s why she claimed to be so busy; she wanted her to get back together with Derek. “No Mom. I’ll just get my friend to help.”

“Ok.”

“Ok. Bye.”

Her mom paused for a moment before speaking. “Bye, honey. Be sure to call me when you get back.”

“Ok, bye.”

“Bye.” The line went dead, the dial tone ringing in her ear.

Brennan walked up to her, his usual smile on his face. “How’d it go?”

Hayley looked at him. She felt frozen inside. Was her heart still beating, her lungs breathing? Finally she found her voice. “She seemed surprised to hear from me after three months of silence. She said the earliest she can be here is tomorrow afternoon. I guess she doesn’t want to miss Wednesday night services.” Hayley attempted to maintain an even tone, but the repressed bitterness shone through. “I guess I’ll just stay in a motel tonight. I think I saw one as we pulled into town.”

“Ok. Do you want a ride to the motel?”

“Sure.” Hayley answered him, attempting to put a bright tone in her voice, but she only managed to sound slightly sarcastic instead.

Brennan’s smile wilted as he turned to leave out the front door. “Come on. Let’s go.”

Hayley followed closely behind him, not speaking, her mind lost in a thousand and one thoughts. They got in the truck and pulled onto the road. Brennan drove the two minutes required to reach the Budget Motel; as he pulled up to the front of the motel, Hayley felt her heart sink even further within her. It looked fairly run down. The brown paint on the walls was peeling and could have used a new coat of paint several years back. The grounds needed to be cleaned of the trash scattered in the parking lot and on the sidewalk. Brennan turned the keys in the ignition, letting the engine go dead, and pocketed his keys.

“So I guess this is it.” Brennan spoke the words to the dashboard, a general commentary, the meaning behind them too strong to be spoken directly. Hayley knew he was waiting for her to respond, but she couldn’t seem to find the right words to say. That seemed to be a repeating curse with her. Finally, after several more moments, of each person waiting for the other to speak again, Brennan opened the door and stepped out. Hayley grabbed her purse and coat and slid across the seat and stepped down from the interior of the truck one last time. She looked up at him; his eyes were focused on something across the parking lot so she looked behind to see what he was looking at, but she didn’t see anything of importance. She felt confused for a moment before realizing he just didn’t want to look at her. He must be really angry with me, she thought despairingly. Finally, she spoke.

“Thank you.” Hayley spoke the words with meaning, trying to put all the gratitude she felt towards him from the past several days in those two words. “Really.”

“You’re welcome.” Brennan met her gaze with his own, a flash of anger in his irises. “Bye.” He spoke the word in an annoyed tone, though there was a hint of another emotion that Hayley couldn’t seem to identify.

She reached the doors and grasped the black metal handle in her hand. The warm sun had warmed it, making it almost hot to the touch. Go back. The thought impressed itself in her brain with a familiar urgency. Now. She paused, fearing her resolution was slipping. “Brennan?” Her voice sounded loud in her ears.

“Yes?” Brennan spoke, his voice sounding calm and collected.

“Stay with me.” She whispered the words, barely daring to let them escape her lips, lest they fall on unwilling ears and her request be denied.

“What?”

Hayley couldn’t be sure, but he sounded hopeful. She repeated herself, a little louder this time. “Stay with me.”

She turned around intending to walk back over to Brennan, but as she did so, she felt two hands lightly grasp her sides. Brennan stood before her, his face gazing down at her, his hands on her body breaking the fragile barrier she had set up between them. “Oh.” She inhaled sharply, surprised at his touch. She looked into his face, and felt overcome with emotion. She didn’t want to leave him, not yet. She leaned in and closing her eyes, she kissed him slowly on the lips. By his momentary pause she could tell he was a little surprised, but he quickly returned the kiss, sending a volley of shivers down her spine. The kiss deepened, and she reached up her hands to his shoulders, getting lost in the wonder of the moment. The kiss ended, and Hayley looked into Brennan’s eyes, her own shimmering with tears. “Stay with me, Brennan.”

Brennan didn’t speak for several long seconds, and Hayley’s gaze faltered, her eyes dropping to the ground, but he gently touched her chin with his hand, lifting her head up once again. “Ok.” He smiled again, his incessant, wonderful smile, and Hayley began to cry, the bottled up emotion finally finding its release.

She pressed her body close to his in a tight embrace. She could barely speak, she felt so happy, but she managed to get one word out past the tears: “Good.”