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Did I ever say I love you to you?Authors Comments: Sorry, I'm not good at writing stories. :)
Drama
 Created on 11-16-08
 Views(28)
 Story Rating G
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I don’t think I ever said "I love you" to you mom, I’m sorry. . .
Ever since I was child, I can use my fingers to count how many memories we shared together, well the ones I could remember. Including this one time I was crying because dad wouldn’t buy me a new toy, remember that mom? You bought snacks for me; you knew that would make me feel better. You were smiling at me while I ate it, that made me feel good inside mom, did I ever said that to you mom?
What about this one time when you came to visit and you stayed a few days? We slept together with my sisters; we were like a whole family, even though I don’t remember dad talking to you that time. I remember they told me that you don’t want to serve us, your children. You felt like we’re just treating you like a maid. But mom have you ever thought that we are just excite to be with you, to taste your food, to hug you, to just be spent time with you? Mom did I ever explained this to you?
I grew without you mom. I never felt that I missed a thing because they always told me you’re bad. That it’s okay that you and dad broke up; and you just left us. Remember when you came to visit again? I was 13. I didn’t even recognized you mom, did you noticed that? You came with my younger brother holding on to you like he is going to die if ever he lets go of you. Mom did you noticed how jealous I am that he got to spend all those times with you?
I was terribly jealous, I felt that we had this huge space between us mom, can you blame me? Every time you talk to me mom, did I ever ignore you? If I did, I’m sorry. Every time you try to try to just be a mother, did I push you away? If I knew that you were only to stay a short time, I would have forgiven you; I would have hugged you mom. I would have cling on to you like that child that I call my brother.
When I left, I saw your eyes, they were so sad. Mom, did I break your heart? Did I still act cold to you back then? I couldn’t remember, maybe because it was long ago or just my brain got rid of that memory because it knows that that would hurt me. Mom did you want us to stay? Why didn’t you say so?
I never knew the next time I’ll go back there, is because of you.
“Your mom died.” I remember dad told us. He had a tear or two coming from his eyes. He had that look of pain and loss on his face, I can’t explain.
“What!? When?” I asked him, trying to make sense of what he just told me.
“She fell down, she hit her head. . .” Dad tried to explain . . . then he put his hand over his face and just sits there
No one said anything for a while, and then my tears came. I was telling myself it couldn’t be true. No it can’t be true, she’s not dead. SHE IS NOT DEAD.
Mom, when did you become so pale? Why are your lips so dry? Mom? Please open your eyes. . . I’m here mom; I know you missed me, so open your eyes. That is what I told her when I looked over her laying in that box. Tears just came out of my eyes and they didn’t seem like they want to stop. I cry while I write this, maybe because the pain is still so raw.
Everybody had the same emotion on their faces when I look at them. They didn’t look familiar to me, maybe because they are my mom’s side. They were asking who are we, where we came from and all that. But I guess no one had the strength to explain, we just stood there and cry, cry over our loss and cry over the pain.
Mom, someone said that maybe this is what you wanted. For us to meet your family and just be with them. Mom, why didn’t you wait? We could have done that someday mom, it would be better if you’re there when we do that. Mom, we were going back there for summer, only a few months away, why didn’t you wait?
I cry over how I wasted time mom. I cry over how my pride took over me. I should have said I love you to you mom, I should have. Even hug you, or spend time with you when we had the chance. I’m so sorry mom, it’s too late I know.
If there is heaven up there, I know you’ll be waiting for us mom. And when that time comes, I’ll let you know how much I love you. Even though I don’t say it and show it.
And did I ever tell you that we were planning to bring you here with us mom? So we could be together again, but I guess we were too late.
Mom, thank you. You made me realize that life is short. And I should take advantage of the time we have. Mom, I love you.
Comments
Please Login to post comments| On November 17th 2008 DaringAngel Said : | |
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omg i practically cried! you are a really good writer! :'( |
