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mypoeticrage

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We sat upon rooftops and gazed down at the burning headlights. We would talk and laugh, drink and smoke, yet all the while I was lost inside the neon that reflected from your eyes. Thre were hundreds of people that would come and go through the years, but to me it was always me and you, no one else. You're the reason I spent my nights there. We were so young, so innocent, and so in love.

"Do you think things will ever change?" you asked me the last night we ever spent together.

"Nothing ever changes," I replied as I took another drag.

"No, I mean with me and you.Everybody here. We'll be graduating soon, and most of them will be going to college or moving away. I wonder what it will be life after that," you wondered aloud.

"I don't know. I'll still be here. What about you?"

"I don't know."

A beer bottle smashed right next to us, and the rest of the group that was still awake came over to the edge of the roof where you and I sat.

"What are you two doin' over here by yourselves?" Aaron asked with a big grin.

"Just talking,"you told him.

He nudged me with his foot."If you ain't goin' to pull any moves her soon, I'm goin' to have to move in and show you how it's done!"

I gave him a wink as I stood up and blew my cigarette smoke in his face."Don't worry about it, man, you could't get any from a girl even if you paid her, bro."

The others in the crowd laughed, and Aaron proceeded to put his arm around you. You dodged him and laughed as well."He isn't lying, you know."

He shook his head and grinned again."Fuck all you guys, I'm goin' home to put my drunk ass to sleep."And with that he stumbled down the stairway.

"And another one down," Just spoke of the group that had now slowly dwindled to seven over the night.

He took a seat on top of an AC unit and began to play his acoustic guitar.Everyone but you and I driftted in his direction, we stayed at the edge of the rooftop gazing across the city.

"It's cold out tonight," you announced as you scooted next to me, and my arm fell around your shoulder."When are you going to try and kiss me, really?"

You looked up at me with asking eyes, and I felt my heart skip a beat. I had loved you from the moment you came to town, a little over five years ago, and we'd always been close, but for some reason I never tried for more. Tonight was the night everything changed. Our lips met and then our tongues, and nothing else in the world mattered as long as I had you. Somehow I'm sure you felt the same.

We ended the kiss followed by hoots and hollers from everybody, and our faces could return nothing but child like smiles.

"You want to get out of here?"I offered.

"Sure," you answered.

We told everyone goodbye for the night, and headed down the stairway. Your house was only a few blocks from the spot, and I walked you home, my stomach doing flips the whole way.

"My dads going to be pissed I was out so late again," you said as we drew closer.

"I swear to God I will kill him if he hits you again,"I declared.

"I'll be okay,"you assured me.

Your father had always been abusive, and it only seemed to be getting worse with time. I'd always wanted to do something about it, but I didnt't know what. You didn't want the police involved, because you didnt want anyone to know.

We walked the final block insilence until we reached your doorstep. I leaned to steal another kiss before we said goodnight.

"Let's go out on a real date tomorrow. We can do whatever you want to," I proposed.

You smiled that gorgeous smile and held me close."I've always wanted to spend the day at the beach, and have a picnic at night by candlelight."

"Okay. Then that's what we'll do. I'll call you in the morning."

We shared one last kiss before you crept inside, and I think that was the best night of my life.

The following morning I had everything prepared to give you the best day of your life, and what I was sure would be mine also. I was just about to pick up the phone to call you when it rang.

"Hello?"

"Dude..."  came Aarons voice from the other end.

"Yeah?"

"I don't know how to tell you this, but...Kara,man. I was goin' by her house 'cause I heart about you and her hittin' it off last night...The cops were there..."

"What? What hell's going on there?!"

I heard him take a deep breath, "I guess that her and her dad got in a fight last night, and he hit her, or somethin'...It was bad enough to give her internal bleeding...she's dead, man..."

I tried to say something, but the words wouldn't come. I hung up the phone and stumbled back, trying to get my thoughts cleared out. I was literally sick from the grief that overcame me in a matter of seconds, and I didn't come out of the house the rest of the day. Nor did I eat or drink anything.My parents tried to comfort me, the phone rang off the hook, but I didn't speak. I glanced countless times at the bag of stuff I had prepared for our "perfect day", and decided to leave it packed. Maybe this was all a dream, I thought.

But the day turned to night and nothing changed.

At 3am I popped open my bedroom window and made the longest walk to the rooftop ever. I came to the spot we'd always sat and took a knee. Tears flowed uncontrollably and I thought of stepping off the edge, yet I knew I didn't have the guts. Instead I spent hours remembering everything we ever did, every word you ever spoke, up until the last time I saw you.

"Things will change more than you ever could have known, love..."