You know how people say...wow oh my i did this with my dad..me and my dad went here, my dad is awesome want to meet him? Well heres something simple...i really dont have a dad. Dont get me wrong, i wasnt made from some random guys sperm lol i do have a father...but the label dad doesnt fit him.
My father wasn't the type of person you would want to run up and yell "daddy daddy" to. He was more of a dead-beat-dad as you may say. He is an alcoholic. When he drank, he became a totally different person. Before i was born, my mom gave birth to my brother. My father used to toture my mom...she was terrified by him. He use to slap, hit, punch. kick, threaten, put a knife to her throat, tell her that he will kill her...kind of guy. One day he grabbed my brother and threw him across the room in his walker. Once i was born....he totally dissowned me. He denyed me as his child and wanted nothing to do with me. All my life he wanted my brother...and that was something that i had to deal with because i couldnt change his mind.
As i grew up....i lived with my mother and my brother lived with my father a couple years...ya know because he said "oh its a better place you can drink...smoke and everything its awesome down here" well it wasnt. I soon grew to my senses when i was about 12. I told him..."you know you werent EVER there for me. you didnt get to see me walk, say my first word, first haircut, boyfriend, smile. and laughter." His reply was a distinct laugh.
Soon when i was little my mom remarried. They had my half sister together and she is the greatest. I thought this guy was the greatest...i called him dad and thought that he was going to take care of me better than my real dad...but i was completely wrong...instead i lived in a nightmare that i thought i would never wake up to
Her dad was four times bigger than me. He completely terrified me and molested me. I would live in fear everytime my mom left the house. I was stuck in a hole...and i couldnt get out. Soon i had enough of it and i completely didnt know where to turn to. I had to tell my brother because i knew he wouldnt tell anybody. I was scared because i thought that he was going to "punish" me again for doin that. My punishment for being bad was him molesting me....even if i wasnt bad...he still would. Between me and my brother he would spank my brother and send him to his room. My brother always wondered why and say that i was "favored" and that i didnt get punished. I was forsurely not getting favored....soon my mom knew...she told him to leave and never come back. I thought that everything that happend was my fault...and that i messed everything up. But i soon realized that it wasnt...i still will not tell people to this day. i think that they are going to look at me different so its a big secret that wont come out to the people who i am close with.
When i hear some people/or friends say. I miss my dad i havent seen him in 2 days...i just look at them and say...at least you have one. I simple dont need one..i have found that out because i am currently talking to my dad....he is trying to take everything good away from me right now and its not going to work. I have the greatest life right now...im working, going to school, i have lots of people/friends that care about me, and i have an awesome boyfriend who i can share intrests and everything with. I just hope someday i can reveal this secret to whom ever walks the streets...because i know that there are kids out there that has had this happen to them.
What i have is a great life.....what i dont need is a father figure
Creative
Created on 1-6-07
Views(103)
Story Rating G
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