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Chalk Hearts (summary)

Ashes of a Rose 11

Tragedy Created on 7-29-07 Views(26) Story Rating G

Chapter 11Almost the end of another beginning Ilyssa was sitting on my bed with me, each of us had a baby in our laps. Keisha was downstairs watching t.v.             "Tris, you know that thing I was trying to tell you the other day in the kitchen, before Keisha came in?"            "Yeah, what is it?"            "Well, I was just wondering…" She gave a heavy sigh. "Okay I’ll just say it. With your mother gone and your father in jail and France being your real home anyway, I was wondering if maybe I could adopt you."            "You weren’t kidding when you said you’d come right out and say it." I said, taken aback by the proposal.             "No, well, we’d need your father’s consent because unless both parents are gone I can’t officially adopt you without it, but, if its okay with you?" She looked at me hopefully.            "Even if I wanted to, witch I don’t, I couldn’t say no after everything you’ve done. Yes, I’d love it."            She beamed at me, "meaning that once all the papers are signed and everything’s worked out, this will be your home."            "Perfect," I smiled back

Key and I were sitting on the curb in front of the school. It was still the middle of summer but the school wasn’t far from Ilyssa’s house and it was a nice day.“Ilyssa is adopting me.” I told Keisha.My announcement was met with total silence.“Key?”She snapped out of her trance. “Sorry, it’s just… that’s great Trista, I’m really happy for you.”I always know when she means what she says and when she’s faking, but this time I was at a loss. “Are you okay Keisha?” I asked concernedly. “Yeah its just,” she sighed, “I just, wish it were me.”I understood. Her foster parents had never really wanted her, they never adopted her and she never wanted them to. “Ilyssa is a really good person, I’d love to have her as a mother or even a close relative,” Key continued.“I know, she is great. But, soon enough, we’ll be eighteen and able to do whatever. We won’t need parents to rely on and until then, even without the official papers, Ilyssa will treat you like a daughter.”“I know but, whatever happens when you move out and have to make it in the real world, you do need parents. You always need someone to love you even when no one else does.”Silently I agreed with her. She did need a real parent, she needed adoption. But I couldn’t just force it on Ilyssa, she had already done so much. I couldn’t just say, my friend needs adopted too. Yeah right.We sunbathed on the curb for about an hour. I pretended not to notice Key’s silent tears, she didn’t want me to know she was crying. Silently we walked home. Nothing was ever said about that conversation again. I guess Keisha felt guilty for putting a guilt trip on me and decided not to mention it again.She sure did take over my job as mother though. It seemed like she was determined to prove to herself that she was a better parent than her real or foster parents. I didn’t mind that she got up in the middle of the night when they cried. I didn’t mind that she spent so much time with them at all. I needed the break to think about Eric, as painful as it was.The one thing that she couldn’t and wouldn’t even if she could do it was breast feed them so if they needed fed at night I still had to get up. Of course I loved (and still do) them and maybe once or twice got jealous of Key for spending so much time with them, but I was generally okay. She would always back off when I wanted some time with them though.She even picked up the talent of picking up both big healthy babies at once, one on each hip. I couldn’t do it for the life of me but she was perfectly fine. I still couldn’t believe that the girl I had always known to hate children was so loving to my kids. But I never mentioned that again either.One major difference in my life since the twins were born and Eric died was that Ilyssa spent a whole lot more time with me. She said she wanted to get to know me on a whole knew level. And she did.We went to Café’s and left Key at home with the babies. Mostly we avoided the subject of the deceased.“I’m so glad I have children in the house still. Do you remember when you first came how I told you I’d always wanted kids?” She said one day.“Yes but you never found the right guy.” I recalled.“Well, actually I never looked for one. Adopting always appealed to me. See, I never wanted to be tied down to a man but I did want children.” As she said this I saw something in her eyes, she was about to tell me something very important. But she wanted me to ask it.“Why didn’t you ever want true love.” I asked, hardly able to wait for the secret.For a moment doubt was shown in my new mothers eyes, should she tell me? Yes, I saw that she would, eventually.It was ten minutes before she spoke.“Well, once I thought I had found true love. We had been dating for four years in college and were about to get married.” Again, she wanted me to ask.“What happened?”“We were living together, for about a month before the scheduled wedding and I found out I was pregnant. When he found out he left me. I found out the hard way about abstinence before marriage.”“But what about the child?” I was incredibly curious and shocked.“She was put up for adoption right after I named her. Her name was Acenith, and I never found out what happened to her except that she lives somewhere in America now.”At first I was speechless, “what? I…” was all that came out. Ilyssa just sat in silence understanding completely how shocked I was. I sat there opening and closing my mouth like a fish out of water for the longest time waiting for something to come out.Finally: “do…do you regret your decision?”“Every day of my life! It was definitely the hardest thing I had to do. Seeing my own child in the arms of a complete stranger for the first and last time as just a baby was…almost unbearable.” She sounded close to tears but my curiosity out weighed my sympathy and I continued asking questions. “So, have you ever tried to look for her?”“Well, no, although I have wanted too. It wouldn’t be to hard to find an Acenith born at a certain hospital in France and immediately given up for adoption I’m sure.”“Do you not want me to tell Key?” I asked kindly.“Right now I would rather you didn’t tell her, I will when the time comes. I love her like a daughter too.”“All right then, it’s getting kind of late, do you think we should go back home?” I was anxious to do some research.As soon as I was back in my room I got out my laptop and looked up the name Acenith. It was African, and African goddess.I thought back to Ilyssa telling me about her younger years, where had she been living when the baby was born?Ah yes, she had once told me that she went to college in a city off of the Atlantic Ocean in Brest, France. That would have been around the time she got pregnant. In the Google search bar I typed the four words that would surely get me the result that I wanted. I clicked on the site that popped up. I went to the baby records.There it was, in June of 1986 I child had been born in a hospital in Brest named Acenith. She had been given up for adoption and an American couple who had recently lost there child in the hospital wanted to adopt.Agness and Robert Leaf had adopted the child and took her back to America with them. They lived in a in Hastings Nebraska. My next stop on the web was an chat room for parents who had adopted children from other countries. The Leaf parents weren’t online at the time but I decided to watch for them constantly. I was right, it definitely was Ilyssa’s child they had. They seemed like decent parents, although I couldn’t help thinking that Ilyssa would be better. They were middle class citizens who had a healthy baby of there own and two other adopted children. Acenith had just moved out to attend a college in New York. She was, after all, 19. Life went on much the same for a week, the week before school started up again. I never told Ilyssa that I had found Acenith or Key that she existed.Then finally the icon of the Leaf parents was flashing, telling me they were online at the same time as me.I wondered how best to approach them.“Hello, Leaflets,” I typed using there on line name.“Hello.” They responded a few minutes later, “my name is Agness, who are you?” The mother asked.“My name is Trista, I live in France.” I replied.“Are you an adopted parent too?” She asked.“No, I am only 17, I am an adopted child.” The sight was mainly for parents but I supposed it wouldn’t hurt anyone if I kid went on.“One of my children was adopted from France, do you know where Brest is?”“Yes, but I live in Le Havre, my adopted mother once lived in Brest, 19 years ago.” I added the last part somewhat reluctantly, I wasn’t sure how best to tell her that she had my mother’s child. “My daughter from Brest is 19, her name is Acenith.”“So was my mother’s first and only child, born in Brest and given up for adoption moments later at the hospital. I hear a couple adopted her from America.” I had finally done it, they could not deny that the child I was talking about was their’s It was a long time before she responded again. I guessed she was calling her husband to the computer so he could read over her shoulder. I was right, when the reply came it was not from Agness.“My name is Robert Leaf, father of Acenith, tell me about yourself Trista.”So I told him all he really needed to know, or at least a twisted version of it.“I was born in France and raised in Arizona, when my mother was shot and my father arrested I came here. My dead fiancé’s aunt adopted me and I just found out about Acenith from her.” I typed.“What is your mother like?” Agness wondered, I could tell it was her by the font type; it was much more girly than her husband’s.“She owns several world famous jewelry stores and is incredibly kind. She would supply a child with everything she needs but not spoil her. She is the best mother a girl could want, besides my late one. And I am NOT just saying that…” I wrote to Nebraska.“She doesn’t know I am doing this, but I believe she want’s to see her daughter again.” I added.“In two weeks Acenith goes to New York to begin college at NYU. If she’s interested, we could send her up to France between then and now?” Agness supplied.“Hang on, that won’t be necessary, I have a plan.” And so I told them my plan, and then prepared for my senior year of high school. 

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