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Silent Knowlegde (VI)
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 Created on 6-16-07
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-November 5, 2007- Lacey- We walked side by side down the sidewalk. The only noise that cushioned our ears was the sound of the occasional car that drove by us. Ever so often I’d make small talk with her, only I would be talking and she would listen. Her hair turned gold in the sunlight. She hopped up and down every time we passed a driveway. She made a game out of it. Once we were nearing the ninth or tenth driveway she stopped and looked up to me.“What sweetie?” I asked. She pointed to me, and then jumped. I laughed, “You want me to jump too”. She nodded and hopped her way to the center of the driveway, glanced back, and waved me on. That’s when we leaped our way down the dollhouse street. It was the third driveway I leaped across when I started to feel “loose”. Almost like the innocents of a child rose within me again. I must look like an idiot, but who cares what this cloned neighborhood thinks anyways. Yellow spiral slides, florescent red monkey bars, and four swings swaying in the breeze. Alison automatically ran to the yellow plastic slide. I watched her make her way up the stairs climbing to the top. She became the little liberty at the top of the yellow plat form. Running my fingertips along the side of the slide I called to her, “Come on down I’ll catch you!” The entrancing deep brown of her eyes twinkled upon me and she clapped her hands. She swung herself down the slide, and I crouched down opening my arms inviting her to land. She laughed like a ghost; silently. Even her belly moved, but no sound come free from her open mouth. Small arms wrapped around my neck, squeezing with all might. I hugged her back. For only the first day, she seemed to really trust me. I was beaming to see the child’s broken face rejuvenate with life again. “Wasn’t that fun” I asked into her ear as she held onto me. I rose, Alison still firmly attached and walked over to the swings. I couldn’t remember the last time I sat on a thin piece of rubber suspended with chains and wasn’t apprehensive about it. She sat on my lap while I fixed her ponytail, making sure not to let my knees go or else we’d be swinging. She jumped off and took the swing next to me. I watched her with care as she pulled herself onto the high swing, “Careful honey” I warned. “Okay I’m gonna push you way up high” I guaranteed. Her hair floated as she swayed back and forth. Sometimes she would start to kick in the air when she reached to the highest point. It looked like she could keep soaring higher and higher if only she could grab the atmosphere with her feet. I was thinking about things I could talk about, but I wanted to make sure she knew I wasn’t going to expect her to talk back.“You know, when I was your age the swings were my favorite” I begun, “ Maybe tomorrow, if you want, we can watch a movie, or play dolls”.She was silent, only the rustles of leaves and the squeak of the swing set filled the air. “Oh, my favorite movie is Aladdin, I bet you’ve seen that one. Princess Jasmine’s my favorite” I admitted. When she flew back she turned her head and nodded in approval. “Good, Aladdin it is”. We sat in the grass of the soccer field located next to the playground. It was completely vacant, but sometimes we’d see a biker or lady walking a dog on the nature trial along side of the field. The trial continued into the woods, I had been around it a couple times for a jog. We sat facing each other with our legs stretched out to make a diamond out of ourselves. For a moment Alison and I rolled the purple and white ball to each other, but then she grew tired of it. Typical little girl. For November it was awfully warm outside, so I rolled my jeans up to my knees. Thank god I wore jeans, I’d die sitting in the grass with a skirt on. Suddenly, she started to silently giggle at my legs. She moved up closer to me and ran her hand across my leg. Oh great now I have to shave for a four year old. I thought I got out of that when I got a divorce. She stopped at my tattoo, and I started to panic; remembering what her aunt’s reaction was to the cancer sign. To my surprised she gently traced it like the symbol was fragile. Then she came down and kissed it. I smiled, “Oh no honey, that’s not a boo-boo, it’s a…” I hesitated, how do I explain this? “It’s a design- a decoration, I wanted it there”. She didn’t look at me; she just gazed at my ankle and continued to trace it. I moved my foot away after a minute to sit Indian style. She looked puzzled at me, then plopped herself down in my lap. I knew it would happen. She’s going to be attached to me from now on, I am a woman figure, and Tabby and I are her only female attention givers. She is a typical little girl, well, in this situation. I wrapped my arms around her, kissed her forehead and said “You know what? You’re my little beautiful” she reached up to my ears and stated to play with my earrings. Then she met my gaze, “Abeh is bettor”. I sat up straight, “What!” I exclaimed. “Abeh is bettor, bettor tan Jasmine, Abeh is mine favorite” she whispered. “You, you, you spoke!” I screamed, enfolding her in my arms. She just grinned at me, ear to ear. “Abu is my second favorite, he’s a very funny monkey,” I said, not knowing what to do next. I looked at her, then continued to embrace her, “I’m so proud of you, You’re aunt Tabby is going to be so proud of you!”Alison pushed my away a little to loosen my grip on her, “You can meet Molly awnd we can pway house with Molly”“Who’s Molly?’ I asked.She cradled her arms as if she was holding a baby, “Sheevs my baby doll, Molly”.“Oh, I can’t want to meet her” I chimed. Just then Alison’s eyes became fix on something behind me. I turned to look back at the trail leading out of the forest. A very tan younger man was jogging on the trail, he had a light brown honey colored highlights in his hair. His jogging shorts were shorter than ones I owned, and his sweatshirt was a tight fit. Alison’s jaw didn’t seem to hold itself up. As he jogged closer to us he started to wave. Alison didn’t wave back. I stood up, Alison holding my hand. The man slowed down and looked around. His face looked almost guilty, and so he decided to say hello to us. “Hey there Alison” he said immediately.I had no clue who he was so I introduced myself, “Uh, Hello. I’m Lacey Rivale”“Oh, I’m sorry, Clark Sandell” he held out his hand. I shook it. Then he continued, “Alison and I are, uh, were neighbors” “Oh, okay, say hello Sweetie” I instructed.Alison was silent, but her grip on my hand increased. This obviously was upsetting her, most likely he reminds her of her old life. Find a reason to get out, Lacey! The silence was awkward, and I broke it saying, “ You know what, she’s just not been herself, you know”He nodded, “I get it,” he glanced down at her and said “She’ll talk when she’s ready, won’t you?”Alison remained mute.“Well, we gotta get going” I announced.“Okay, good meeting you, and Alison, you take it easy” Clark whirled around and started jogging again. Hmm… he’s toned… too toned. It’s always the gorgeous guys. I bent down to Alison, “Are you okay” I asked sympathetically. Her eyes stared into mine; she was silent. Driving back to the office I was reviewing what had all just happened. From the warmth I was privileged to share with Alison at the park, to the awkward meeting of Clark. Alison’s soft voice dwelled in my thoughts; her little mispronunciations, her dialect. My Little Beautiful. Then, I thought about how frustrated Tabby became when I told her what had happened. I would have been concerned too if my niece wouldn’t speak to me either. Mrs. Hamcott made me laugh to myself. I could remember the very words she used to describe Clark; a homosexual who lives and breathes Satin’s ways. I laughed to myself once more, and then turned on the radio. * * * *
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Please Login to post comments| On June 17th 2007 bluehotpixie Said : | |
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not to be a critic but you misspelled Satan in the last sentence |
