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bowzlady1

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I was sleeping when I heard Ty’s voice from the kitchen.

“… Yeah. But I’m kinda busy right now…” he said.

I opened my eyes and saw that it was dark outside. I sat up and grabbed my phone.

12 missed calls. Shit!

I saw that I had missed 4 calls from my mom; 3 from Danny; 3 from cocoa, and 2 from Shugg.

I knew they were all probably wondering where I was so I decided to call my mother first.

“Hello?!” She said picking up the phone.

“Hi mommy.”

“Where the hell have you been? We all been worried sick!”

I let out a breath. “I’ve been around… Just took a little walk to clear my head dats all. Then I decided to go catch a movie…”

The lies were coming out smoothly.

“Oh… well where are you now? You alright?”

“I’m fine. I’m just over in the shopping center. I’ll be home by 11.”

“It’s 9:00 now…”

“I know… actually, can I stay over at Danny’s tonight?” I asked.

“Yeah go head… call when you get there.”

“k.”

We hung up and I looked up to see Ty in the doorway.

“Erything cool?”

“Yeah…”

I texted Danny. “CumN ova 2nite”

“K. Whut Time?”

“11ish.” I texted back.

“Aight. L8r!”

“xoxo.”

I got up and went into the bathroom to fix my hair and freshen up. I took a quick shower and got out to put on my clothes.

“Ready to go?”

“Yeah… I’m ready.”

We were on the highway home and I couldn’t keep my mind off Ricky. I really felt guilty that I hadnt told him to come with me. If it hadnt been for me leaving the situation alone he might still be here.

“Why you so quiet?”

I didn’t say anything. He looked over at me, then back to the road.

“Are you gonna answer the question?” He asked.

I still didn’t say anything. Then I looked at him.

“You know how sometimes you just feel so guilty about something and no matter how much people may say its not you’re fault you always feel it is?”

He glanced over at me again.

“I been there; I’m not gonna say I haven’t… But sometimes at the end of the day you gotta realize things happen for a reason. Maybe things look bad now, but later something may happen to make you see shit in a different light.”

I looked at him. “That ever happened to you?”

He nodded. “The day I first saw you… I wasn’t even supposed to be around southeast ‘cuz I had shit to do. My son Freddy told me to ride out to the go-go dat night and at first I was like no cuz I’m busy… Then I changed my mind at the last minute… not only did I meet you but I saved myself from getting shot up like some people I would have been with that night if I hadn’t come around here.”

I looked at him in shock. I didn’t say anything though. Its not that I was shocked about the getting shot at thing, but who would wanna shoot this sexy dude?

I got quiet and started looking out the window.

We pulled up to Dannys building about 10 minutes after that.

I opened the door and got out of the car. Before shutting it I looked at him. “I’m really glad you changed you’re mind that night.”

I smiled and he smiled back then I shut the door.

I called Danny and told her I was coming up and to open the door. As soon as I got up there she had the door open.

“Man I was calling you Galore!” She said as I entered.

I nodded. “Sorry… I was sleeping.”

“Girl please! Yo mama been callin’ you too. You mighta been sleepin but chu damn sure wasn’t in YOUR bed!” She had the look like yeah-bitch-you-caught!

“See what had happened was…” I flipped my hair over my shoulder.
“I uh… I fell asleep in the movie theatre.”

She cut her eyes at me as if to try and figure out if I was telling the truth. She should have known I wasn’t but she shrugged, “What eva.”

“are you gonna go take a shower? I already took one…” she said.

“me too.”

She widened her eyes. “Uhuh I knew it!”

I knew I had slipped up but I decided to play it off. “you knew what?”

“You was ova somebody house and you fucked!” She said.

“Shhhh! Is granny here?”

“Nope! Now spill it before I have to whoop dat ass!” She said crossing her arms over her chest.

“Girl please! That’ll be the day…” I went and sat on the couch. “Okay… I went over Ty’s house after the funeral.”

“And?”

“What do you mean and? Nothing happened… I just fell asleep.”

“Why are you lying to me? I know you had sex!” She was obviously irritated. “Just tell me how your first time was…”

My eyes started welling up with tears when she said that. I felt like I was a really bad friend. I know I should have told her this a long time ago but how could I even begin to?

“He wasn’t my first Danny…” I said looking at the floor.

“Come again?”

“Ty wasn’t my first… I’ve had sex before tonight.”

This is when the tears really came. I was trying so hard not to have to re live this but this is my best friend. I had already kept this from her for more than enough time.

She came and sat next to me on the couch. “Why you cryin?”

“Because… I should have told you this when it first happened. I was just so confused…”

“What happened?” She asked sounding concerned.

“I did love him. I really did. I loved him so much that I told myself I shouldn’t love him like this. I told myself not to love him like this… He was my everything for just that short period of time and I never got to tell him…” I said.

“Kiki… you talkin in circles right now… tell me…”

“Its not that hard to figure out! Ricky’s gone and he’s not coming back!” I yelled. “And no matter how much I miss him… he’s never gonna just be there for me like he was then… he’s never just gonna call me and talk to me. Never again! And maybe if I hadn’t been so stupid… A piece of him might still be here…”

Danny looked shocked. I could tell that last sentence was replaying in her head… “You… you were pregnant?”

I sniffed and wiped my face. “I did want it… but… I was scared of what he would say if he knew… I didn’t wanna risk the humiliation. Now… I wish I had done things differently.”

She held her hands up to her face and it looked like she was crying. I was confused.

“Why you cryin’?” I asked sitting up.

“B-Because… I- I was too.”

“You were what…?” I had a feeling of what she was talking about but it didn’t seem likely.

“Pregnant.” She said in a small voice.

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Okay so lemme take a moment to tell you all about my saturday night. I went to bowwow concert last night and I was like FRONT ROW... oh buts thats nuffin! I went backstage and was all up in his dressing room and this dude was SOOOO SEXY! Yung berg was there, Dj unk, and Dj jus... bowwow daddy was there TOO! Man he was looking right at me singin "like you" and I sware I was bout to DIE!

But yeah I made sure to go in his dressing room and eat the SAME pie he was eating! LOL. it was good too. but I been A bowwow fan 4eva and I just wanted to be able to say "Me and bowwow shared a pie" LLS. I kno Im a trip!

That about it... TMWYT!