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bowzlady1

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He looked at me for a minute and didn’t say anything. I grew agitated and got up and made my way for the door.

“Wait!” he ran in front of me and shut the door. “I know what I wanted to talk about I just needed to think about how to say it”

I turned around and looked at him. “you had all day to think about how to say it, I’m here now so spit it out and make it snappy”

He looked caught off guard by my response and I turned around and sat on his bed.

“I wanted to talk about us,” he said quietly “I need us to be back together”

I looked away from him and tried to collect myself. But nothing I did could hide the pained expression on my face.

Should I tell him why I did it? Should I tell him more about me, than I’ve ever revealed to anyone else?

“Just tell me what I did,” He said coming and kneeling in front of me. “I can fix it”

“You called me… you said ‘we need to talk’” I wasn’t sure if he heard me. My voice was barely above a whisper.

“What?” He asked.

“You called me, and you-”

“-No I heard you… but, why would you break up with me because of that? I wasn’t gonna break up with you angel!”

“Every since my mom…”

There it was, the first tear. I began to cry. I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t tell him. And even if I did tell him, How would I even begin to describe the pain she put me through. 

I couldn’t do it.

“Every since your mom what?”

Silence.

“Every since your mom did what baby”

Still no answer.

“You can tell me” He grabbed my hand and held them tight.

“She… When I was younger she… she left me. She, she never came back”

“what?”

“She left me… since then, I never let anyone else do it… I cant let you do that to me”

I cried more as he grabbed me and let me cry into his shoulder. I cried for about 10 minutes, and that was a long time for me. I never cry. I never show any sign of fear at all. So that was a very big step.

I let go of him and stood up. “I… I have to go, but thanks for everything”

“Wait I-”

“No… I just cant Eric”

I left out of his room and ran down the stairs. Again I waved bye to his mom and kept going. When I got outside, the tears began again. But I didn’t try to stop the flow. I felt like it was something I need to do. Tonight, I needed to cry.