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It’s been a few weeks now. Me and Sho was still cool and talking, even though I knew about him and my brother, but I still kept my mouth closed. Sho and I had real deep feelings for each other, but we still weren’t together yet, but it’s like I can never control myself around this dude. Whenever I got around Sho, we both just had this vibe. We’d get around each other and give each other “the look”, and I always enticed him in anyway that I could. When I walked passed him, I made sure I walked hard enough for him to see my ass jiggle. When I touched him, I tried to get as far below the waist as possible, and when I looked at him, I fluttered my eyes and flashed a few seductive smiles. It drove him crazy. I can’t even telll you how many times I gave this boy erections. And I guess one day he just got tired of it…..

We was alll outside chillin’. me, Laura, Nadia, Shaneka, and the boys; Sho was outside too, and everybody was just coolin’. Shaneka was flirting with Sho all day, and even though Ssho wasn’t phased, he flirted back, although I still kept his attention. We kept glancing at each other and shit, and Laura had to be the one to notice.

“Oh-Oh,” she said. “You ain’t jealous, huh?”

I knew she was refering to the fact that Sho and Shaneka was flirting.

I turned and looked at her.

“Girl, no!” I said that like it was an insult…

Sho glanced at me again, with his eyes slowly looking me up and down.

“Say, y’all,” he said getting up. “I be right back…”

I watched him as he walked off…

He gave me a li’l signal to follow him without anyone knowing that he wanted me to follow…

“Say Laura, what time it is?” I asked.

“It’s eight thirty, why?”

“C’mon, let’s go to the store right quick,” I said.

“Alright, C’mon Nadia..”

Me, Nadia, and Laura went to the store. Shaneka stayed with the boys…

While we was walking up the street, I walked slowly behind Laura and Nadia; That’s when all of a sudden, somebody pulled me behind one of the project buildings, and I was in Sho’s arms, with his hands all underneath my shirt, all on my hips, thighs, and my ass….

“Sho, what is you doing?” I asked

He bought his face to mine and kissed me.

“C’mon Cee, we been doin’ this too long,” he said.

He put his hands on my booty and grabbed it sooo tight…

I rubbed my hands all over his body…

“Sho, let me go,” I whined. “I gotta go…”

I tried to walk away.

Sho pulled me back, then pressed my back against the wall.

I wrapped my arms around his shoulders.

“Cee, you been feelin’ me,” he said. “I can tell by the way you walk, all the shit you do, that’s how I know you still want me… we can’t just be friends, you want me and you know it…..”

“Sho, I gotta go,” I said.

“Uh uh girl, you ain’t gotta go nowhere,” he said.

He kissed me on the shoulder, and even my breast, then he started sucking on my neck…

That shit really sent my body a sensation…

I started shivering. My panties was so wet, I didn’t know which way to turn…

“Sho I gotta go… What I’ma tell Laura ‘nem when they notice I’m gone???” I asked.

“Tell ‘em anything,” he suggested.

“Oh my gosh, Shooooo,” I moaned…

He continued sucking on my neck.

O wrapped one of my legs around him.

It felt so good, it was ridiculous…

I guess when you a virgin, any physical contact with a fine ass nigga like Sho felt good.

Once he finally stopped sucking on my neck, I knew I had a passion mark, because I knew that’s what he was aiming to do.

“Can I go now?” I asked.

He grabbed my butt again, then he gave me a long kiss…

“Now you can go…” he said.

I left from behind the building first, then once I was halfway down the block, Sho left and went back to where he was, by the boys…

I went and met Laura ‘nem at the store. When I got there, they were on their way out.

“Damn, Cee, where you went at son?” Laura asked.

“ ‘Cause girl, I had to stop and talk to D on the phone right quick, so you know how that go,” I lied.

“Oh, you still need to go in the store?”

“Naaa, I’m good,” I said.

“Okay,” she said.

We all went back to where we were chillin’ at.

My eyes landed right on Sho.

He was still playing around with Shaneka, but I knew I had him wrapped around my finger…

“Say Cee,” Laura called interrupting me from my thoughts.

“What’s up?” I asked.

“Ask D if you can spend the night by my house, my peeps went outta town, and my brother goin’ by his girlfriend,” she said.

“Alright, cool,” I said

Moments later, my phone rang.

“Speaking of D…hello?” I answered.

“Watsup?” he asked.

“Nuthin’, just chillen with Laura ‘nem.”

“Oh, um yeah… where you at?”

“I told you, I’m on 135^th with Laura and Nadia,” I said. “Oh, and D, can I spend the night by Laura?”

“Dat boy gon’ be there-”

“No, her brother will not be there, D,” I said.

“Come home first, alright,” he said.

“Alright,” I promised.

“Alright, later…”

“Alright, byeeee….”

CLiCK!!!

“Laura D, said I can spend the night by you, but I gotta go home first,” I said.

“That’s watsup, but oh, its only gon’ be me and you though, cuz Nadia ass goin’ to the Bronx by her sister house tonight,” she said.

“Yup, matter fact, I gotta go now, so I’ll se y’all later… come with me Shaneya,” Nadia said, “Bye y’all…”

Nadia and Shaneya stayed in the same building together, so they left together.

“Well we might as well go, too then,” I suggested.

“Yeah c’mon, cause I need to talk to you.”

Laura and I walked up the sidewalk slowly.

“What’s up with you and Sho?” she asked.

“What you talking about?” I asked with a smile on my face.

“That was him that pulled you behind that building, huh?”

“What? How you know?”

“Girl, y’all two is a mess, why y’all just don’t go together?” she said.

“Because, we friends…” I said.

“Yeah, and I see that passion mark, too. C’mon now, Cee, I ain’t slow,” Laura said.

“Girl, he is sooo fine!!!”

I closed my eyes, fantasizing about the things I wish me and Sho could do. The things that were very possible for us to do…

“Hellooooo, Celiciaaaaa!!!! Open your eyes before your ass run into a brick wall!!!” Laura yelled…

“Girl, we was ‘bout to pass my building up…” I realized.

Once we reached my house, D was home, and so I packed me some clothes, and he dropped me and Laura off to her house…

“Y’all asses go straight inside, no niggas!” he reminded.

“Yo’ brother li’l sexy ass is a trip,” Laura said once he pulled off.

We went inside Laura’s house… and her brother John was still there. And guess who was with him??? Yes, Sho…

“Heyyy Celicia,” John greeted.

“Hey John, hey Sho,” I said.

“C’mon Cee,” Laura said…

I followed Laura to her room.

“Girl, I didn’t know Sho knew your brother,” I said.

“You need to take a bath?” Laura asked.

“Yeah,” I said. “But I’ll wait till your brother’nem leave…”
“Alright, c’mon, let’s go back by John then,” she said.

When we went back in the front, Sho and John was leaving out the door.

“Oh Johnathan, where y’all goin’?” Laura asked.

“Lite this joe right quick,” he said.

“Oh Oh, c’mon Cee,” Laura said.

We followed them outside. Laura shared the blunt with Sho and John… and I just watched…

“Say Cee, you don’t want no hit?” John asked.

“Nope, she don’t smoke,” Sho said.

He looked at me and smiled…

“Say Sho son, you know ya girl Shaneka who stay in one of the front buildings?” John asked…

“Fucken Right,” Sho said.

“Dat hoe fine, huh?”

“C’mon now,” Laura said. “I don’t want hear none of that, just gimme the weed…”

“Yeah, these New York girls just like some of the New Orleans hoes,” Sho said.

“HOES????!!!” Laura snapped.

“Shut up before I take my weed,” her brother threatened… :”Say Sho, who you think is the cutest chick you saw in New York so far, outta every girl who stay right here in St. Nick…”
Sho’s eyes landed on me…

“I’m looking at her,” he said.

“Celicia!!!” John exclaimed. “OOOOOOOhhhhhhh…..”

They both looked at me and I looked at them as John whispered something in Sho’s ear.

They both started laughing…

“I know,” Sho said.

“Stop talking ‘bout my friend!” Laura said giving Sho the blunt.

Then John whispered something in Laura’s ear.

“Ohhh,” I heard her say. “Cee, come here friend.”

I walked over to her.

“Sho said he want know if you’d ever let him smash.”

“What??? What is that?” I asked.

“If you’d ever give him some,” she rephrased.

I looked over at Sho.

“Laura, let’s go inside, I’m tired,” I lied. “And you loaded!”

But to tell you the truth, I’d love to fuck Sho, but I wasn’t ready for all that right now…

“Alright, let me just finish this blunt right quick,” she said…

“Ypu might as well go inside because I’m finna go,” John said.

“Yeah, and we gon’ have to walk through that pissy ass hallway by ourself…”

After Laura took a long hit off the blunt, we both went inside.

“Say Cee, hol’ up, gimme a hug before you go,” John said.
“Do something stupid, hear?!” I said.

I walked over to him and gave him a quick hug, but he wouldn’t let me go.

“Ahhhhhhh!!! Let me go!” I screeched.

“MMMMMMMWWWWAHHHH!” he gave me a big wet kiss on the cheek.

“Uggggghhhhh!!!!” I yelled. “Stupid!”
I jecked away from him, then me and Laura walked off…

“Bye Sho,” I said waving at him.

“Damn, why y’all two just don’t go together!!!” Laura said.

“Because…” I said.

“Because what?” she asked. “Y’all try to hide it in public that y’all fooling around on the D.L. sayin’ y’all don’t like each other and shit but people already know!!!”

“But D-”

“Awwww shit…. D trippin’, he always blockin’ your action.. He don’t never want you with no niggas; what he want you with pussy!!!” she yelled.

I looked at her and laughed.

“Bitch, he just bein’ protective, but I just got a feeling that he wouldn’t like Sho,” I said.

Well, they did have beef…

“Why you say that?” Laura asked.

“C’mon Melph, Sho twenty one, he out’chere doing the same shit D doin’. D said he don’t want me with a nigga like him,” I explained. “Cuz he know what niggas like them do to girls…”

“Well, tell his fine ass to stop doin’ it…”

Laura never admits it, but she has a huge crush on D. It was quite obvious, but he said she was too young, so she’d have to wait a few years.

Both of them a mess, huh?

When we got inside, I took a bath, then Laura went and took one, then we got on myspace to check our pages on her computer…

“Damn Cee, you got 32 friend requests,” Laura exclaimed.

“I do?”
“Yeah, and bitch, most of them niggas…”

“Well accept ’em then,” I said.

“C’mon now, I gotta check my page too, you trippin’,” she complained.

“Well do yours first,” I said.

Since the computer was in John’s room, that’s where me and Laura was, and so while she was on the computer, I lied across John’s bed on my stomache and searched through this box where he kept his cd’s and shit…

He had a few condoms in the box, but his music was mostly Li’l Wayne mixtapes, and a few of his albums, old and new, bootleg, but in good condition. They had some cd called “New Orleans Bounce”, but I didn’t know what that was, all I knew was that it was a New Orleans Thing.

While I was searching through John’s li’l cd collection, I suddenly felt was his heavy hand slapping me on my ass…

“Ouch!!!” I screamed.

I looked up at him.

“Boy, I didn’t even know your ass came in here,” Laura said.

“Yeah, Amiya downstairs, I came to get me some rubbers,” he lied.

“C’mon now, you just came up here because Celicia in here,” Melph said.

“Shut up Doodah,” John said, calling her by her original nickname.

Instead of getting what he said he came to get, John got money out his stash.

“Bye Celicia,” he said.

He waled out of his room.

“Your brother make me fucking sick!!!” I yelled.

“Why, what he did?” Laura asked.

“He slapped me on my ass and that shit hurted!” I said.

She laughed…

“What’s up with niggas and ass, huh?”

“They fuckin’ stupid…”

“Oh um, say Cee, don’t entertain your boy, hear? Sho, ’cause he just tryna fuck something I mean, it’s obvious you like him, but just watch dude…”

“Why you say that? You the one who wanted me to go with him, and now we a few steps there, so now you think I should avoid him or something?” I asked.

“No, go with him if that’s what you wanna do, but don’t let him fuck you and try to just leave you like a flonkie; no homo, but you my dawg and I ain’t gon let no nigga make you out no flonkie… no matter how cute, sexy, fine they is…” she preached. “ ’Cause Sho is hot…”

I got up and sat next to Laura at the computer…

“You checked your page?” I asked.

“Yeah, I had like 12 friend requests… now I’m finna check yours,” she said.

We logged on to my page and Laura showed me all the requests I had…

She said I had 32, but now I had 36...

“Damn, they ain’t nothing but boys and shit… girl they must love your default picture,” she said…

Maybe they did. I liked it, too. It was a picture of me wearing a high skirt with my back (and my butt) facing the camera, with my head looking back, and a smile on my face. I had a baby doll shirt on with it that tied up in the back. In the picture, it looked like I had on mo shirt, but I did!

I was at Laura house when I took that picture. It was strictly for myspace, because I’d never be seen in public like that. Not that any thing was wrong with the outfit I had on, but if D caught me wearing that, I’d get a beat down…

I never let him see my myspace because of that picture, ’cause he would still beat the fuck out me…

“Oh looka him, that boy cute!!!” I said when I saw one of the boys. “Oh, he left a message, too… read it.”

“Oh, hold up let me see,” she said.

“What it say?” I asked.

“Are you… awww c’mon now,” Laura yelled. “These niggas is obsessed… all them sayin’ you look like Buffy the Body…”

I gave Laura a look.

“I don’t look like her,” I defended…

“Well, built like her then…” she corrected.

“Who else sent me some requests, keep looking…”

“Oh, looka, that boy from New Orleans…”

“Bitch, that’s Sho,” I said.

“Awww shit now, let me see if he left a comment or something… yeah; let me read it: all you niggas back down…. Cause….. That…. Ass is…. Mine… awww c’mon now, Sho coulda done better than that!!!” she said.

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!

Somebody knocked on Laura’s front door…

Then Laura’s phone went off…

“Damnnn…” she said.

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!

Laura got her phone and answered it…

“Hello?” she answered.

She got up and answered the door.

I hopped on the computer, and then I tried to send Sho a message.

The message said: what you doin’ with a myspace? And if my ass was yours wouldn’t you be in the picture with it?”

“Oh Celicia, come here!” Laura called.

I went to the living room and saw Sho at the door…

“What?”I asked.

“Stay down here for a minmute, my brother told me to go get some weed for Sho out his stash,” she said…

“Alright,” I said.

I stood in the door with Sho while Laura went to do what she had to do…

“Wuzup?” Sho asked. “What y’all doin’ up in here?”

“Nothing, we was on the computer…”

“Oh, I sent you something on myspace…”

“Yeah, I saw… and what you doin’ with a myspace, I thought you would think you too grown for all that…” I said.

“I don’t get on there too much, just to find a few hoes every now and then…”

“Oh, I’m a hoe?”

“No,” he said. “I’m only saying,” he said.

“And boy, you a trip… since when I was yours?” I asked.

He looked at me and smiled…

“Since now,” he said.

He grabbed me in his arms and wrapped them around my waist.

“Mmm-mm-mmm,” Laura said as she walked in on us…

I looked backat her as I quickly jecked away from Sho…

“You got my shit?” Sho asked.

“Yeah,” Laura said.

She gave him a bag of weed…

“What kind of weed that is?” she asked.

“Damn, you a li’l weedhead… Why???” Sho asked.

“Cuz, I want some,” she said.

“Man, you ain’t getting none of my shit,” he said.

He pulled out twenty dollars and gave it to Laura…

“This for John?” she asked.

“Yeah-”
“Where you finna go?” Laura questioned.

“To my house,” Sho answered.

“Ain’t you finna go smoke? Where you gon’ smoke at?”

“At my house!” he said.

“Oh… your auntie at home?”

“No, she went to the N.O. man, c’mon stop questioning me,” Sho said.

“C’mon, let me just light that with ya one time,” Laura begged.

“Nope…”

“I want some,” I finally said. I knew he wouldn’t tell me no.

“What?” Laura and Sho asked.

“I said I want light that blunt with you, and if you light with me, you gotta give Laura some too,” I said…

“Alright,” he said.

“Hey, but we can’t light it up in here,” Laura said.

“Alright, let’s go next door…”

“Wait, let me go put on some shoes…”

Me and Laura went to her room and put on our shoes, then we went with Sho down the hall to his apartment in our pajamas…

Laura and me crashed on the couch and watched Sho carefully roll his blunt.

“Say son, you don’t mix your shit with nothing, huh?” Laura asked.

“Hell No!” Sho said.

“Oh, alright…”

Once Sho rolled the blunt, he lit it, and took a drag on it…. And though I never smoked weed before, it smelled sooo good.

After he hit the blunt, Laura reached out to get her turn on it…

“Naahhhh,” he said. He reached over and passed the blunt to me. “Let Celicia hit it…”

“Huh?” I said.

“What you ain’t scared huh? Not that chick from St. Nick…” he teased.

With that said, he put my head all the way in the clouds.

“Give it here…”

I took the blunt from him and slowly put it to my lips.

Soon as I took a drag on it, I choked…

“Damn Cee,” Laura patted me on the back.

I was about to give the blunt to Laura until Sho said “Wait.”

I looked at him.

“Hit it again…”

I put the blunt back to my lips.

“Now, don’t drag on it too fast, take it in slow, don’t breathe theough your nose until you blow the smoke out,” he coached.

Damn, I thought. I didn’t know somebody could teach you how to smoke a blunt.

But I did exactly what he said, and I didn’t choke not once… I looked at Sho and started laughing…

I didn’t know what I was laughing at, I just felt light headed, like I was flying, and that shit just felt crazy!!

Then Laura and Sho started laughing, too.

“Ahh, her ass loaded,” Laura teased.

“I got enuff weed to roll another one,” Sho said.

So I smoked the rest of the blunt by myself, and we all smoked the second blunt together…. Plus, Sho had enough to roll up another one, so our asses smoked three blunts!!!!

“Mannn, I’m hungry now,” Laura said.

I sat on the couch, leaned back against the sofa with beads of sweat on my forehead.

“I’m hot…” I whined.

“Y’all want me to buy y’all something to eat?” Sho asked.

“Yeah…” Laura said.

“Mannn, why I’m so hot!!! Sho…”

“What?” Sho said. “It ain’t my fault that weed got you horny,” he teased.

Him and Laura laughed.

“Ain’t nothing funny, you put something in that stuff,” I accused.

“Nahhhh bay, I wouldn’t do that,” he promised.

“C’mon man, let’s go get some food,” said Laura.

“I’m going next doot to put on some clothes, ‘cause I ain’t bein’ seen in no pajamas.”

“I’ma just put some jeans on…”

Me, too…”

“Say Celicia!” Sho called.

“What’s up?”

He blew a kiss at me…

I walked over to him and gave him a kiss on the lips, then I left…

‘Y’all is uh mess,” Laura teased. “But do you Cee, just remember what I told ya…”

“Oh, I ain’t gon’ forget,” I said.

We went to her room and changed into some jeans, then went back over by Sho.

He had his shirt off when we walked in, and my li’l coochie started steamin’…

“Dammmnnn Sho, you a fine ass nigga yeah,” Laura complimented.

He looked at Laura and smiled.

I just watched him with lust in my eyes, and studied the tattoes that covered his body like graffiti on a subway in Harlem.

He went to the bathroom and changed into a fresh shirt, then came back out…

“Say Laura, you locked your house up?” I asked.

“Yeah,” she said.

“Alright y’all, come on…”

We went to McDonald’s, because Sho said he didn’t feel like looking for anything else that was open late…

I told him I didn’t want McDonald’s, but he got me some food anyway.

He got him and Laura some large fries, and two double cheeseburgers each, and he got me a large fry with a ten piece nugget, and all of us had large sodas.

After we got the food, we went back to Sho’s house.

We sat around the kitchen table and I watched him and Laura eat like dogs, but me, I ate my nuggets piece by piece, tryna look cute. High with the munchies or not, I’m not finna eat like a dog in front of no boy! Bad enough I’m scared to eat around one(depending on who they are…)

But then again, I wasn’t really hungry, I kept watching Sho eat…

I just loved the way he looked when he chewed his food!!! He had the most perfect bone structure, and the way his jaws looked when he chewed was just cute to me. It’s like any move Sho made, it turned me on!!!

I forgot about the food sitting in front me and watched him eat…

Once him and Laura were finished, Laura was ready to go…

“Alright Cee friend, you ready?” she asked.

“Oh, um, yeah…”

“Say, if you don’t want your food, you can take it or leave it here,” Sho said.

“Uh-Uh, your li’l greedy ass can have it,” I teased..

“Y’all want me to walk y’all down the hall?” he asked.

“Yeah,” I answered without hesitation.

Sho grabbed me by the waist, and Laura led the way out the door…

“Celicia, the next time we smoke together, let it just be me and you, so you can get horny again,” he said…

“What?” I yelled. “We’ll never get together if all you want do is fuck something…”

“C’mon now, we got close to fuckin’ so many times; you can’t say you never thought about fuckin’ me, tell me you never thought about it…”

Yeah, I thought about it, but I wasn’t finna tell him that.

“Nope,” I lied. “I’ll fuck a nigga when I’m ready to fuck…”

“Well when you do get ready, make sure it’s with me alright, ‘cause I’ll make your first time worth while…”

When Laura went inside, Sho kept me outside with him.

“Sho please, can I please go inside…”

“Nooo, stay with me tonight, come back down the hall with me,” he begged.

“Why?” I asked.

“Cuz I want fuck…”

I pushed him away from me…

“What?!” I yelled. “Nigga, you ain’t in New Orleans no more, don’t come at me like that…”

“You know you like that shit Cee, why you tryna play me?”
“I’m not tryna play you Sho, I’m just scared aiight, I’m scared…” I said.

“Scared of what?” he asked.

“Niggas like you ain’t worth the trouble; if I let you fuck, you gon’ leave me alone, niggas always tryna fuck over me, just cuz I wouldn’t let them fuck… so imagine if I do…”

“You must think I’m a whole lil boy outchere, c’mon now, I don’t play games girl,” he said…

Maybe because this nigga older than me, and he so sexy and shit, and his ass knew he turned me on, he must really think I’m easy. Maybe I seem easy because of the shit I let him do to me. We be kissing and shit, and we do like each other, so like, what else we gon’ do???

“Well look, I’m tired, can I see you tomorrow…”

“I wanna take you out tomorrow, vut I gotta go do something first, but like I told you, if you aint my girl, you can say fuck it…”

“Shut up, Calvin,” I said…

Then while we was all hugged up, somebody tapped me on my shoulder…

When I looked back, it was my mama…

“Celicia, what is you doin’ in this hallway with this boy?”

“Mama, this Calvin, he was just walking me back to Laura house,” I said.

My mama looked at me with puppy dog eyes and started rubbing all over her body…

“Well I don’t want you with no boys, cause I will tell your daddy…”

“My daddy???”

“Yo’ brother, not your daddy. Now Celicia, can I borrow twenty dollars please baby?” she asked…

“For what??!” I yelled.

“Celicia, I need a fix… plllleeeeeasssseee, pleaseeee, gimme twenty dollars,” she begged.

I remembered that I had money from earlier when me, Laura and Nadia went to the store, so I checked my pocket and found a ten dollar bill…

“Here, all I got is ten,” I said.

“Thank you soooo much baby, I’ma pay you back-”
“HOW?!!!” I yelled.

I looked at her with rage in my eyes, mostly mad because I was financing her to get drugged up when I wanted her to get clean…

“Don’t holla at me girl,” she said looking like she was about to cry. “I’m the mama…”

She said that and hurried off like a kid who had stolen a piece of candy…

“That- That’s your mama?” Sho asked.

“Yup,” I said. “Unfortunately.”

“Damn, that shit fucked her up…”

“Look Sho, I’m finna go inside alright?”

“Yeah, I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said.

I kissed him on the cheek, then went inside.

Laura was still on the computer, and so I ended up falling asleep in John’s bed. His sheets and shit was clean, and I liked sleeping in his bed because the scent of his cologne was on his sheets and it smelled soooo good! Laura slept in her room. When I woke up the next day she wasn’t in here.

I woke up and went to the bathroom and freshed up, then I went in Laura’s room and she was still sleep. So I took a shower and got dressed. When I got out the shower, she was still sleep, so I went back in John’s room and got on the computer.

Then John came in. it was only eleven thirty when he came home, and ready to get back to bed…

“Cee, what you doin’ in my room?” he asked as he walked in.

“Hey to you too. John…”

“And why you ain’t make my bed up?” he asked.

“Nigga I’m your guest, you gotta make your own bed up,” I teased.

He hit me on the back of my head.

“Where Doodah at?” he asked.

“She still sleep,” I said.

“Oh, what you on the computer doin’?”

“Nothing, checking my myspace…”

He came next to me and looked over my shoulder…

“How come I ain’t on your top?” he asked.

“Why would you be?”

“You on my top,” he said.

“And what Amiya think about that?” I asked.

“She don’t know, I hide my top… she ain’t even got my password or no shit like that… why she need to see that shit…”

“See, that’s sad, ‘cause you got something to hide…”

“So… what she don’t know won’t hurt at all,” he said.

He kissed me on my cheek.

“Stoppp!” I yelled.

Then he went and made his bed…

“So you know my son like you?” he asked.

“Who is your son?”

“Sho, you already knew…”

“I like Sho, too, but he all for fuckin’ and I’ma fuck a nigga when I’m ready,” I said.

“No, but dude really like you…. You just be stuntin’ on that nigga, and you know that’s down bad!” he said.

“That nigga on some real shit, what that dude want play you for…”

“The same reason you playin’ your girl for me,” I said. “Somebody you don’t even have.”

“Mannn, alright, that’s watsup, I ain’t trippin,” he said.

“Yeah, uh-huh.”

I logged off of myspace, then I shut down his computer, and got out his room…

“Yeah, get out,” he said.

“Fuck you!” I yelled.

I walked out and went to Laura’s room. She was just getting up…

“Bout time you woke up… your brother here, and that nigga getting on my nerves…”

“Girl I gotta go brush my teeth.. We gon’ go see Kelley,” she said. “Cause you know she pregnant…”

“Oh, I ain’t seen my friend in a long time, where she been?” I asked.

“She stay in the Bronx with her auntie…”

“Is she really pregnant?”

Yeah!!! That’s why we goin’ see her…”

“Oh,” I said.

“We goin’ out tonight, too,” she said.

“With who?” I asked.

“Whoever want roll…”

“Oh, alright, that’s watsup!!!” I said.

“But let me go get fresh then…”

She went to the bathroom, and I stayed in her room, texting on my cell phone…

Then John came in Laura’s room.

“Doodah! Oh, where Laura at Cee?”

“In the bathroom…”

“Say, you want to a li’l quickie right fast,” he teased.

I gave him a look…

“That is NOT cute…” I said.

“That’s alright, I still love you…”

He blew a kiss at me then walked out.

Then after the next ten minutes Laura spent in the bathroom, there was a knock on the front door…

“Yo John!!!” I exclaimed. “Somebody at the door!!!”

I went to his room and his door was shut and locked with music blasting…

So I went and answered the door.

“Who is it??!” I asked

“Sho!!!”

I unlocked the door and let him in in a heartbeat, like this was my house!

“Wasup bay, you still here,” he said.

He tapped me on my ass.

“Excuse you…” I said.

“Where John at?” he asked.

“In his room…”

I sat down on the living room sofa…

Sho went and knocked on John’s bedroom door.

“KNOCK!!! KNOCK!!! KNOCK!!!”

“Open the door nigga!!! Come your ass out!”

John came tumbling out his room…

“Damn man, you had to knock on my door like that,” John said.

“Let’s go light this blunt right quick,” Sho said.

“That’s all y’all do is smoke!” I said.

“You want some?” Sho asked me.

“I don’t care…”
“Alright, well c’mon then…”

“Okay, hold up…”

I went and told Laura that I was going with Sho and John, then I left out the door with them…

We all went outside to smoke the blunt.

“Wait, Celicia, you gotta hit this first, I gotta see you smoke,” John encouraged.

“What? C’mon, why I gotta go first… c’mon, you bein’ an asshole, nigga gimme the blunt…” I yelled.

John gave me the blunt and I took a long drag on it…

“Damn…” I heard somebody say.

I was so gone on that blunt that I didn’t even notice that my brother’s friend George was standing right behind me…

“Oh my gosh, G!” I exclaimed.

“You must want your brother to slaughter these niggas,” he said mugging at Sho. “You chillin’ with the nigga we got beef with…”

“Beef!” Sho yelled. “Nigga, I don’t even know you like that, son!”

“Yeah, so you aint the nigga who almost shot Cee fuckin’ brother???!!”
“WHAT?!!!” I yelled. “Look George, I-”

“You know what, I ain’t gon’ even tell D… I’ma let you and this pussy ass nigga slide,” he said.

He bat the blunt outta my hand then walked off…

“Sho, you got beef with my brother?” I asked although I already knew…

“Look Celicia, it’s not even like no hard up beef shit…”

“Sho, you know how I feel for you, I love you-” I blurted out

Okay, now I know I didn’t just tell this nigga that I love him… that weed musta been getting the best of me.

“You what? You what? You love me? You love me?” he asked. “C’mere Celicia…”

“No, I didn’t, I didn’t mean to, I’m just, I’m trippin’…”

Oh my gosh…. I think I am in love with him, just because I can’t have him…

“You don’t love me? Or do you?”

“I’m, I gotta go-”

I turned and walked off.

“Come back Cee!” he called.

I rushed back inside by Laura. She was finally out the bathroom.

“Girl what’s wrong with you?” she asked.

“Nothing,” I lied.

“You ready?” she asked.

“Yeah…” I said.

We left out the door. On our way out, of course we had to pass Sho again, so you know how that go!!!

“Say Celicia, come here girl!” Sho yelled as we walked pass.But I kept walking…. “Oh Cee!!!”

“Sho calling you girl,” Laura said.

We stopped in our paths.

I looked back at Sho.

“What?” I asked.

“I love you, too…” he said.

My eyes became filled with lust as I looked at Sho,

“What you said?”

“C’mere and I’ll tell you,” he bribed.

Laura pushed me in his direction, and I walked over to him.

He grabbed me into his arms…

“Isaid I love you too,” he whispered in my ear.

He kissed me on the cheek then let me and Laura go ‘bout our buisiness.

Laura was exthatic about the situation that had just taken place…

All the way to Kelley’s house, she questioned me about the situation. I told her everything, even about George catching me smoking with John and Sho. I tried to be careful not to say too much to the point where I might slip and tell her about D and Sho’s beef. When we got to Kelley’s house, there were children running around in the hallway playing tag, it, and all tose types of games. One of Kelley’s little brothers, six year old Mark, was out there…

“Say Mark, where Kelley at?” Laura asked him.

“Inside!” he said.

We knocked on Kelley’s apartment door. She was back in St. Nick, after spending a while in the Bronx by her aunt or whomever.

“Who is it?”

“Laura!”

“And Celicia!”

Kelley opened the door, wearing a long night gown and some house slippers. I noticed that Kelley really was pregnant and now there was proof. You could see her small belly poking out…

“Hey hoes,” she said flatly.

“Hey Kelley!!!” I exclaimed.

I gave her a hug.

“Wasup Kells…” Laura greeted.

We walked in the living room and sat on the sofa.

“See, I knew your ass was pregnant, how far you is now?” Laura asked.

“A couple of months,” she said. “About two.”

“That’s sad, you don’t even know how many months you is,” Laura teased.

“You told Derek?” I asked.

“Fuck Derek…” she said. “I told him, but he trippin’, telling me to get an abortion and shit like that…”
“Well why you don’t want get one?”

“Because I went through the process of making it, so I’m keeping it… why would I kill it if it didn’t ask to come here anyway?”

“And that’s watsup…” Laura said.

“But what Derek said?” I asked constantly.

“The truth foreal though is… he don’t want me to have it because- he not claiming it…”

“What?!!!” Laura yelled. “That nigga out his fucking mind!!!”

“He the only one I been fucking with!”

“Girl, I didn’t even know niggas still didn’t claim babies!!!” I said.

“That’s okay, I’m through with Derek, I got me, and I’ma take care of my baby…”

“And you know we got your back 81/80,” Laura said.

“So what presumed y’all to come over here?” she asked.

“We ain’t seen you in a minute, so we wanted to stop over right quick…”

“And yeah Ms. Celicia,” Kelley started, “They say you and Sho is officially official now…”

“Girl… since when?” I said.

“Since today when he told you he loved you outside where anybody coulda heard,” Laura reminded…

I rolled my eyes at her.

“Well we goin’ out tonight,” I said changing the subject, “and we was wondering if you wanted to come, too…”

“Girl, no, it’s best I stay inside to avoid bumping into Derek, cuz if I see dat boy, I’ma kill him…”

“You gon’ see him sooner or later, so just go out, we know you tired of being inside all day, so come out with us tonight…” I said.

Kelley looked around as if searching her mind for thoughts about coming…

“Mmm… alright,” she agreed.

“Datz watsup! Now we gotta see what’s up with Nadia and we’ll see you later, and we gon call you to tell you when to be getting ready,” Laura said.

“Okay,” Kelley said.

“Alright Cee, let’s roll..

Me and Laura gave Kelley a hug, then we left.

As we walked back to Laura’s house on our side of St. Nick, we actually ran into Devin and Derek, the dude Kelley was pregnant for.

“Watsup Cee!” Devin greeted.

“Hey Devin, I ain’t seen you in a while!”

He gave me a hug, then Laura.

“SO, where y’all goin’?” I asked.

“Oh, we goin’ back on 116^th, we just left off of 132^nd,” Devin said.

“Who was round there?”

“The Hood.”

“Oh alright…” I said. “And so Derek; Kelley pregnant, so what you gon’ do?”

“Dat baby ain’t mine, so what you gon’ do?”

Boy, you better get the fuck tryna play my friend!” Laura yelled…

“C’mon Laura, don’t get ignorant on this nigga,” I teased. “he not even worth that N.O. beat down, you might accidently kill his ass…”

I grabbed Laura by the arm and we walked off…

“Girl, these niggas something! That’s why I don’t want get pregnant right now, I try to be so careful…”

“We goin’ back to your house?” I asked.

“No, let’s go to your house…”

“Alright…”

We made our way to my house.

When we got there, D was there. Soon as I walked in the door he questioned me…

“Where you been?”

“Donovan, you know I was by Laura!!!”

“Hey Donovan,” Laura greeted.

“Watsup Ma,” he said. “Hey Celicia, I need to talk to you right quick, alright…”

“About what?” I asked.

“I’m sure you probably already know,” he said.

“And when you-”

“I need to talk to you right now…”

“Laura wait for me outside, please…”

“OUTSiDE???!” she exclaimed.

D looked at her.

“Lauraa!!!” I grunted.

“Al-alright, I’ma see you on 132^nd, if not, 125^th, Aiight? Alright…”

She threw the deuces then left out the door…

“So you smoking weed now, huh?” he asked.

“What?” I asked, pretending I was confused.

“You heard me, George already told me… he said at first he wouldn’t me because he wanted to cut you some slack, but he said then he woulda been disrespecting me by not telling me…”

“Okay, and what’s the big deal…”

“You smoking with niggas and shit, what the fuck you doin’ smoking anyway! Bitch is you out your fucking mind!”

“Stop calling me a bitch!!!” I yelled.

“I call ’em like I see ’em; you my sister, but if you wantact like that, want a nigga to turn you out like a junkie, then go ’head BITCH!!!” he yelled.

My eyes were stinging from tears that I was trying to fight back…

“Grandma!!!” I yelled.

“Grandma not here, she in the hospital, she had a light stroke…”

“Well she alright?” I asked.

“She alright, but till you can prove to me you still the same Celicia, then you still a bitch to me…”

“D why you tryna do me like that?!”

Because Cee, I don’t know what I’ma do with you… I don’t know how to get it in your head that not everybody gives a fuck about you… I’m tryna protect your ass,” he preached. “I don’t want you out ’chere getin’ pregnant and shit…. What, you wanna be a fuckin’ weed head? That shit ain’t cute! Looka your friend Kelley, she pregnant for a nigga that ain’t even claiming her baby. And it ain’t even born yet! That shit sad, and I don’t want you to end up like that!!!” he said.

“But that’s not gon’ happen to me!!!”

“You don’t know that, if Greg was here he would want to protect you!”

“FUCK GREG! He NOT HERE Donovan, he not here, so stop rubbin’ that shit in my face! He wasn’t here for me, so fuck him!!!”

“First of all, stop cursing and raising your voice; Celicia, you know that I know that Greg wasn’t here when we was growing up, but that don’t mean he never was here… just because he locked up you want say fuck him? You want forget about him? That’s your fuckin’ daddy… and we ain’t rocking like that… I’ma hold him down.”

Donovan said thar, then he walked off and went out the door… a few minutes later, I did the same. Laura was still outside waiting for me…

“Damn,” she said. “What happened? D looked heated as the fuck…”

I burst into tears and started telling Laura everything that happened…
“That’s colddd…. George wrong for snitchin’ on you though…. Why D go off on you for stupid shit…”

“I’m sayin’,” I agreed.

Then as we made our way on 125^th street, we ran into Sho and one of his dudes. I quickly wiped the tears from my eyes as we approached him closer and closer…

“There go your husband,” Laura teased, tryna change my mood I guess.

Sho walked directly in front of me and stood in my path to keep me from walking away…

“Watsup,” he greeted.

“Hey Sho… umm… look I gotta go…”

“Go where bay?”

I gave him a look.

“Bay?” I repeated.

“Yeah, ‘Bay’,” he said.

He wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him, then he kissed me on my neck…

“So what’s this suppose to mean?” I asked.

“You my girlfriend, stop playin’ stewpid, li’l girl…” he teased.

“Why, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing, I’m just feelin’ a little down right now,” I said.

“You goin’ out tonight?” he asked.

“Yeah,” I said as if it was crazy of him to ask.

“Oh, well I might just see you later,” he said.

He hugged me.

“And oh, you might want avoid me tonight because if I catch you looking right, you might get that cherry popped…” he teased.

I looked at him like, “what?”

He musta read the look on my face…

“Girl, I ain’t playin’,” he said. “Just watch.”

I looked at Sho (yup that nigga was loaded.)

He slapped me on the ass then walked off.

“Girl, who does he think he is…” Laura said.

“Bitch, I don’t know…”

“I can’t believe what he told you though! Oh oh,” Laura teased. “Cee bout to get that cherry popped… lawd what D gon’ do now!!!”

“Girl, I ain’t worried about Sho…”

“But reel talk, you’ll let him smash if it get to that point?” Melph asked.

I smiled silently to myself.

“Mmmm-maybe,” I said.

“Ain’t no maybe, Sho gon’ get that… just don’t make it easy friend,” she said…