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The Knight In Rusting Armor (Work In Progress) |
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The Knight In Rusting Armor (Work In Progress)
Fiction
 Created on 2-10-07
 Views(155)
 Story Rating G
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He walked into the square of the town, his breastplate with patches of rust spots and his word a feeble thing, made in a small town by the blacksmiths recently orphaned son. His elmet a cheap half helm with a dent on one side and scratchs along it's surface, his lightly curly shoulder length hair flowing out from underneath it's edge.
His cheap leather chaps were covered in the dirt from the road, and he walked uncomfortably s his cheap armor brushed together. His boots old things, looking as if they were ready to be made scrap cloth, and his gloves cheap torn leather.
His face was strong, and fine, as if carved from clay by a master statue maker, his face covered in dirt like his leather chaps and with heavy stubble from not having time to shave.
Around his neck was a fine necklace, very set apart from the rest of him, lying out in the open against the little bit of his white undershit that could be seen, it was a blue gemstone, surrounded by silver that flowed down the jewel like water, shining against his cheap armor and dirty, no longer white, shirt. It shone as if it were inpenetrable to the dirt and grime of travel, polished to a fine sheen.
Like the necklace the mans eyes were just as out of place, a deep dark green color, almost glowing of their own volition, and changing colors slightly as the light from the sun hit them, or was hidden by his dark brown hair.
The man drew attention from the civilians to be sure, but nothing special. another adventurer wandering about for easy money and good times. He stopped walking and looked about, searching for the tavern he was told of.
The Orange Sword's doors were propped open with an old chair. A malingerer lying in the dirt just outside it's door, surely kicked out for unruly behaviour as he was bruised and bled a little from his lip. The man, Dahmen, walked in the doors of the cheap smelly tavern and almost choked when the smoke and smell flew up his nostrils, assailing his senses and making his eyes want to water.
Once he was over the overwhelming fumes of the tavern he looked about for an empty table, but not seeing one, walked to the counter instead, turning his head to regard a read-headed tavern girl on his way.
"What can I get fer ye t'night sir?" the feeble looking chubby bartender said through broken teeth.
"Just any ol' rum," responded Dahmen in his low soothing voice.
Dahmen noticed at the sound of his voice that the red-headed girl he was watching on his way to the counter turned back to him, and locked eyes for a moment, then shyly looked away and fumbled her way to the table she was headed toward. He chuckled at that, then accepted his rum and payed the man.
He scanned the tavern again, and took a sip of his rum, swallowing the strong liquid, but looking not for a table this time, but for anyone he might find information from. And as there always is, he spotted a sketchy fellow in a dark corner, trying to look inconspicuous but in the process making himself all too apparent.
His cheap leather chaps were covered in the dirt from the road, and he walked uncomfortably s his cheap armor brushed together. His boots old things, looking as if they were ready to be made scrap cloth, and his gloves cheap torn leather.
His face was strong, and fine, as if carved from clay by a master statue maker, his face covered in dirt like his leather chaps and with heavy stubble from not having time to shave.
Around his neck was a fine necklace, very set apart from the rest of him, lying out in the open against the little bit of his white undershit that could be seen, it was a blue gemstone, surrounded by silver that flowed down the jewel like water, shining against his cheap armor and dirty, no longer white, shirt. It shone as if it were inpenetrable to the dirt and grime of travel, polished to a fine sheen.
Like the necklace the mans eyes were just as out of place, a deep dark green color, almost glowing of their own volition, and changing colors slightly as the light from the sun hit them, or was hidden by his dark brown hair.
The man drew attention from the civilians to be sure, but nothing special. another adventurer wandering about for easy money and good times. He stopped walking and looked about, searching for the tavern he was told of.
The Orange Sword's doors were propped open with an old chair. A malingerer lying in the dirt just outside it's door, surely kicked out for unruly behaviour as he was bruised and bled a little from his lip. The man, Dahmen, walked in the doors of the cheap smelly tavern and almost choked when the smoke and smell flew up his nostrils, assailing his senses and making his eyes want to water.
Once he was over the overwhelming fumes of the tavern he looked about for an empty table, but not seeing one, walked to the counter instead, turning his head to regard a read-headed tavern girl on his way.
"What can I get fer ye t'night sir?" the feeble looking chubby bartender said through broken teeth.
"Just any ol' rum," responded Dahmen in his low soothing voice.
Dahmen noticed at the sound of his voice that the red-headed girl he was watching on his way to the counter turned back to him, and locked eyes for a moment, then shyly looked away and fumbled her way to the table she was headed toward. He chuckled at that, then accepted his rum and payed the man.
He scanned the tavern again, and took a sip of his rum, swallowing the strong liquid, but looking not for a table this time, but for anyone he might find information from. And as there always is, he spotted a sketchy fellow in a dark corner, trying to look inconspicuous but in the process making himself all too apparent.
Comments
Please Login to post comments| On November 4th 2007 LolitaWings Said : | |
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Really good writing. Im impressed. Other than a few spelling mistakes (which are typos) it's pretty much perfect. I like the style but I've never heard of R. A. Salvatore. |
| On May 30th 2007 brokenwing3 Said : | |
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Very good descriptive writing |
| On May 26th 2007 LadyDutch2 Said : | |
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I like it. I hope you write more! can't wait
-MJ |
| On May 18th 2007 Aegle Said : | |
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wow so entrancing and I think you should continue. Also in the first paragraph you don't mention his hair color The fifth paragraph is when you mention it. Just so you know. lol. Check out my story Delilah please. |
| On May 18th 2007 xxcassiejayxx Said : | |
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i like it, you shoudl finish it |
| On May 18th 2007 RJN1981 Said : | |
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I like it and think you should finish it but first I recomend that you keep his hair color the same (it changes from the first paragraph to the 5th. Oh and also the read-headed tavern girl? I'm just picky like that and pay attention to details...otherwise you've got me wanting more. |
| On February 10th 2007 ShadowXall Said : | |
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This story is partially inspired by the writing styles of R.A. Salvatore. If you like what you see, I recommend you to his books. |
