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A Paper Done Twice

Story of my life..a friends life..and others as well.

NonFiction Created on 2-29-08 Views(19) Story Rating G

Dear Reader,            This world can be a very odd place.  In this odd world, there are many people with many different lifestyles.  Everybody has their own problems, and everyone has their own issues.  Everyone wants to fit in.  Some people's aspirations are not to fit it.  All can be understood in one way or another.  Everybody makes good decisions...bad decisions, and then there are decisions that everyone feels like don't matter.  The smallest of decisions; whether it be to call someone or to E-Mail them or whether it is to wear a grey or red shirt.  These decisions are sometimes the most important.  But, tell me this: Do our decisions really matter?  Will the decisions about how we dress make a difference in the world tomorrow?  Well, no, probably not.  But the other decisions; those are the ones that will change this home that we call Earth.  The big decisions; the ones between good and evil, or between help and harm; these are the choices that will really affect us.  I would like to share with you the story of my life, the story of a friend's life, and the story of how all history repeats itself in one way or another.  I would prefer if you just read this intro, and nothing else...but curiosity has already gotten the best of you by now.  Thank you, for taking the time to read this,

-Luke T. Moore
           

Hello, my name is Dennis Lamoure.  I am a sophomore at White Bear Lake North Campus.  Maybe I should tell you about myself so that you have a better understanding of who I am.  A lot of the things about who I am are a result of many things happening in my life.  All I'll say for now is that I am the Narrator of the story.  Right now, the only reason I can think of for writing out my life, is so that people can understand the troubles that everyone goes through.  I've been through them, Freddy's been through them...Nicole, and I'm sure even Logan and Jessica too have gone through these problems.  The problems I'm talking about will be revealed in this book.  To start the story, we must go back; far back to the year 2004...seventh grade.    Book One,Chapter One.  Freddy Stevens seemed to be a normal kid, as far as anyone and everyone knew.  He seemed to be just like everyone else.  He was good at putting out the vibe that he was happy, and cheerful.  It seemed he had his life made out for him.  Freddy was an only child, but had loving parents, honest friends, a good education, which he was still going through, and he had a roof over his head.  Freddy wasn’t the strongest kid; if anyone felt like trying, they could pummel him.  Lucky for Freddy, he had no enemies, and no one wanted to hurt him.Although it seemed that Freddy was living the life, he kept a deep dark secret.  He told no one.  As good as his life was, Freddy was overcome with a deep sadness, because he was lacking something that he wanted so dearly.  Freddy wanted to love, and to be loved.  He didn’t feel the love that he felt he deserved.  Freddy wanted a girl.  He didn’t want just any girl.  He wanted the right girl; a girl that he could hold, and kiss, and love.This wasn’t the only reason Freddy was so depressed though.  Freddy had been in denial of God for roughly four months.  Having grown up in a Christian family, Freddy seemed to know all there was to know about God.  He had doubted his beliefs in those four months, and he didn’t know why.  It was painful for him to feel this way, and to think about the situation.  These thoughts and doubts plagued him so much that he wasn’t able to complete his schoolwork.  For some reason, when he was doing his work, his mind would wander, and he would always find himself thinking about his disbelief in God.Freddy’s doubts continued to plague him for so long that a passing thought of suicide came.  Freddy didn’t think about it seriously at the time, because he knew it wouldn’t solve anything.  But from that point on, whenever Freddy tried to do his schoolwork, he would think of his doubt in God, which led to the thoughts of killing himself.All of this worrying had harmed his mind, and all of his sadness had hurt his body.  Slowly Freddy began to get sick.  He was beginning to think about killing himself more and more.  It would be so easy…everything would be gone, and my pain would be gone…gone.  This was the thought that kept in his mind for what seemed like an eternity.  But, fortunately for Freddy, there was salvation; summer was here.

Dennis Lamoure was good kid.  School had just let out, and he finally was able to find relief in summer from the effects of his terrible procrastinating habits.  These procrastination habits plagued Dennis for many years, and nearly ruined him on several occasions.  He thought that most things were more important than doing his homework.  But, summer was here, so he was going to make the best of his summer.  Dennis wanted to do as much as he possibly could before 8th grade started up.Dennis had a brother, Justin, and a sister, Holly.  Both were older than Dennis; Holly was the oldest.  Dennis got along with both very well, although, Justin, being the older brother, beat on Dennis quite a bit.  Dennis didn’t necessarily mind, because he loved his brother.  Dennis had both a mother and father, still married.  It seemed that he had this perfect little family.Friends, however, were hard to come by in that part of Dennis’ life.  At that time he could only name about four.  Two of his best friends at the time were Freddy Stevens and Logan Fitzgerald.  Dennis was very thankful to have two friends as great as these ones.It isn’t at all uncommon in this part of life for a teenage boy to question his faith, and for Dennis, this was the time he was taking his faith into perspective.  He had his personal doubts about whether or not God was real, but he always acted like he believed.  Dennis talked to friends about God, because he new that is what he was supposed to do, but inside, he felt his soul beginning to tear apart.  For months Dennis had this lingering thought: Have I committed the unforgivable sin?  Have I sinned so much that God can’t forgive me anymore?  To Dennis, it felt that way.Towards the end of the seventh grade school year, Dennis had gotten made fun of so much at school for the way he looked, dressed and acted.  Dennis was a bit chubby, dressed sloppily, and was pretty outgoing. In fact, looking back, I'd say that Dennis was a little too outgoing-obnoxious even.  It wasn't entirely his fault for being made fun of though.  Dennis had asthma really bad, which prevented him from playing many sports.  Dennis' family didn't have a lot of money, and he had to wear hand-me-downs or really cheap clothes found on clearance.  For the most part, Dennis didn't mind, but when kids would judge him for it, he was saddened.One day, Dennis was so upset by the constant agony of middle school that he walked off to his locker cussing and swearing.  He was just so mad.  Dennis didn't understand why God had put him in the family he was in, and he was ticked.  Dennis heard God say to him, "This will work out in the future," and before Dennis thought about it, he retorted, "Fu** you, God!  I'm tired of this life!"

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