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FruitcakeCaz

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My mind is swimming with all the possible explanations I could give him. There's no way I'm telling him the truth. "Steve, I got drunk with you, I think you practically raped me and now I think I'm pregnant" Yeah- that'll go down a treat.
Lies, lies, lies...
Science homework? Sex ed homework? Biology homework? SOMEONE'S HOMEWORK?!
No wait... that's too easy. It's not for me? THAT'S IT- but who could it be for? Can't be Rachel- she is actually more frigid than me if that's even humanly possible. Can't say it's Charlotte either- we don't talk anymore after having a massive argument. Craaap... Hayley! My brother's girlfriend- it's perfect.

But then for some reason, the gobby side of me kicks in. I don't know why- it happens when people start fights with me. But Steve is only my ex- and he's asking a reasonable question. But I'm still going to mouth-off....

Me- "Give me three good reasons why I should tell you, and I'll consider answering you"
Steve- "WHAT THE FUCK?"
Me- "Seriously Steve- why should I tell you? It's private"
Steve- "I have a right to know"
Me- "Why?"
Steve- "We only broke up two months ago for God's sake-"
Me- "And we were only together for two months"
Steve- "But we're best friends Abi... we tell each other everything"
Me- "You didn't tell me about your new girlfriend did you? You didn't tell me about losing your virginty, did you? You bought a car last week- you told everyone except for me!"

Then it hits me like a canonball. He lost his virginty to his new girlfriend. Nothing happened that night- it couldn't of! And sure enough, as I look at the demon white stick glaring at me, it shows me the best word in the entire world.

Negative

I'm so happy I could cry. But Steve would hear me- I don't do crying. I hate it. It makes a terrible mess of my face and it gives away one of my weaknesses. So I get my mouthy side back.

Steve- "ABI- ARE YOU GONNA ANSWER ME OR WHAT?"
Me- "Well tell me Steve, who do you think that test was for?"
Steve- "There's no way you've had sex... you told me you weren't ready over and over again"
Me- "That's right- I wasn't ready with you. Maybe if you should have been more patient. But like a typical guy you couldn't wait. "
Steve- "Who Abi? Who did that to you?"

I need a name.
Harry, Taylor, Robert, Nathan, Nick, Sean,... MAKE IT UP WOMAN!

Me- "Phil!"

I practically scream it down the phone. I hang up. He calls back so I throw my phone at the wall- it's indestructable so it doesn't matter. I clasp the pregnancy test to my chest. Now that I'm alone, I let a few tears break free. I have my innocence back once more. My freedom is returned. Once again, I have a life to live.

It takes me a good ten minutes before I realise that I am in fact hugging a stick with my pee on it.

Nice...