How to say "I love you" [7]

Antonio sat next to Spencer, away from me. I felt hurt inside. Like he had betrayed me again. But he probably had someone. Just like I have Adam. Something in my gut told me that I had done something. Said something, anything. I could feel Adam's hand run against my arm to my shoulder. "Delena? Are you okay?" He asked. Spencer eyed him, and repeated, "Are you okay?" Antonio stared off into the distance. I didn't answer. I couldn't. I was missing my old Antonio. One that would call me names just to see me laugh at them. But he always knew I wouldn't mind. The one that I used to share my lunch with. One that had shared his lunch with me...The one that would smile, and make my world seem bright.

But I was getting ahead of myself. He must not feel well...I thought. Spencer knew I didn't like akward silence. Nobody did. So, of course he had to start with a stupid remark. "Hey! You dummies, I know you ain't thinkin'. Why you all so quiet?" Adam laughed quietly and smiled. Antonio turned to Spencer, and there it was. That wonderful, petrifying smile that would stick in your mind until you couldn't stand it. I froze in thought, staring completly at him. Then, a chill raced up my spin. No! Stop it! I yelled at myself. That tingling feeling couldn't come back for Antonio. It was Adam. I was not going to think of Antonio like that, when I was with Adam. "Antonio...why'd you shave your head?" Adam had to start it up again. His deep voice curling my mind into a knot. It knocked the feelings right out of my head. At least, for a second.

"I uh...I had to shave it for the Air Force Training Program." He answered. I don't know what happened, but my head spun and my face felt hot.

"I have to get some water!" I suddenly shouted. Springing out of Adam's arms, I rushed over to my bag on the other side of the basketball court. I didn't look back. How could I do this? Why had I done that?! I hit myself in the head and rubbed my eyes. "Stupid..." I whispered.

It was still raining outside. The sound was so calm, and it worked on my mood a little. Just staring at it seemed to be enough. I had to think though. For a minute. That was all I needed to think of what to say when I went back over into the war zone.

"Delena?" Suddenly I felt that voice run in my ears with a burning over-math. "Oh...Adam." I coughed. He placed his hand on my hand and turned me with one shirt movement. "Is there something with Antonio? Is anything wrong..." He knew. Adam knew. I couldn't contain myself. Instead of crying, I wrapped my arms around his waist. "No..." I lied.

How did...How could I do that?