Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Sixteen

I went to my room, after Ben had left to go home and change. I looked in my closet for something to wear. 'Blue dress, pink skirt, white shirt, I thought as I looked through my closet. Ah ha! My black dress. I remember wearing this dress to my grandma's funeral. I thought about her funeral and quickly shook it off. I was really close to my grandma. She was the best, but breast cancer took her life. I cried for two days straight. "Hmm," I said outloud and grabbed the dress from the hanger. I laid it on my bed and looked for my black shoes. I dug everywhere for them, looking under my stuffed animals that I got when I was little to clothes that had fallen off the hangers. I took all of my stuff out of my closet and looked around my closet. Found it! I got my shoes and looked around my room. "Crap!" I said. All my stuff was on the floor. I threw the stuff back into my closet and shut the door. Then I grabbed my dress and undergarmets and headed to the bathroom.

I got my clothes and shoes on and headed down to the living room. When I got there, Marissa was sitting on the couch watching TV in her funeral attire. "You OK?" I asked her and sat down beside her. "I guess. I mean my whole family is dying. DAMN! I hate my life," and she threw the pillow across the room, barely missing my moms vase of flowers. "Well, I'm not going to say it's OK because it's not. I don't know how you feel, so I'm not going to say that I know how you feel. All I'm going to say is I'm sorry and I feel so bad for you. I wish I could be in your shoes for a second and see how you are coping with this." She looked at me and smiled a bit, "Thanks," and she got up to retreive the pillow that she had thrown. KNOCK!!KNOCK!! Must have been Ben. I went over to the door and opened it. Sure enough, it was Ben. He was dressed in a black suit and had flowers in his hands. "One for you, one for Marissa, and one for Uncle," he said and handed me a flower. "Thank you," I said and kissed his cheek lightly. "Here, Mar," He said and handed her a flower. He hugged her, "Thanks, Ben." "You're welcome. So, are you guys ready to go?" "Yeah," and we headed out to the car.

We drove to the hospital to pick up Mrs. Smith and then headed just down the road to the burial grounds. Ben parked the car and we all got out. Marissa looked around and took a deep breath, "Well, here goes nothing," and she held her mothers hand as they walked to the place where Mr. Smith was going to be buried. We took a seat and waited for it to begin. "I really don't want to be here. I don't want to put him in the ground, Kat," Marissa looked at me with pleading eyes. I grabbed her hand, "It's OK Marissa. Your mom is just as scared as you are. You're going to have to do this. For you, your mom and your dad's sake. OK?" and then I let go of her hand. She nodded her hand and leaned her head on Ben's shoulder. When it begin, I didn't know If I could stay. It was just like my grandma's funeral. It was only two years ago. She looked so peaceful laying there and so beautiful in her yellow suit. It was her favorite thing to wear to church. She loved going to church, and even if she couldn't go, she'd watch it on TV. I remember that day all so well. I remember listening to my favorite song, 'Cancer' by My Chemical Romance, on the way there. I don't think I ever listened to that song the same way again. Suddenly, I jolted out of my thoughts just as Marissa tapped my shoulder for us to stand. Marissa, Ben, Mrs. Smith, and I went over to the casket and laid all our purple flowers onto the casket. Just as Marissa did, a tear landed on the casket. She just stood there, as if waiting for her dad to come out of the casket and surprise her, but he never did. Ben grabbed her hand and we walked away.

After everybody put a flower and such on the casket, they lowered the casket into the ground. Marissa watched them. The more he was in the ground the harder she cried. I felt so bad for her. No amount of "I'm Sorry" made anything better. She cried into Ben's shoulder and held her. I looked over at her mom, greeting everybody and hearing them say they were sorry for her lose. I couldn't help but shed a tear for these people. For a man I didn't know. For the family that lost a son, cousin, father, uncle. We headed towards the car afterwards and drove straight to the hospital. Only Marissa and her mom got out. "I'll walk her into the hospital. I'll be right back," and they walked away from the car. "God, today was so hard," Ben said, relaxing as he laid the seat down to rest his eyes. I nodded my head yes and laid against his chest. Today had been hard. Even for me and it wasn't even my dad or uncle. I thought about today for a long time, when suddenly Marissa opened the door and got back into the backseat, "We can go now," she said in a mono tone. "How is your mom?" I asked her as I sat back up. "She's OK. I talked to the doctor for a second and they said she had two weeks to live. Oh boy, my whole family is gonna be gone in two weeks. Aren't I just so THRILLED!!" She screamed the last of her sentence. Ben looked back at her, "It's OK. I know it's hard. Remember, I'm always here for you, OK?" She nodded her head and looked out the window. I looked over at Ben and gave him a sympathetic look. He shrugged and started driving back.