My Own Demise: Part 5

After my fourth gulp he told me to no more. He probably knew that I wasn't used to drinking something so strong. I sat back, resting my head against the back of the seat. I didn't feel anything.

"Why don't I feel anything?" I asked tilting my head sideways.

"You will." he said giving my leg a squeeze before returning it to the steering wheel.

His contact never seemed to last long. Long enough for me to know he liked me for more than a friend. Not long enough for me to react.

A few minutes went by and I could feel the vodka working it's magic. I call it magic because with vodka, one minute your feeling as sober as a nun in confession and the next your world is turned upside down. Like your on a roller coaster that keeps doing loopty-loops. Making your head swim and spin.

I held up one of my hands and waved it in front of me. My vision blurred, making it seem like it was moving in slow motion.

I'll tell you two things about myself. When I'm sober I can be a little shy, unsure of myself sometimes, but generally happy and outgoing.

When drunk I am even more outgoing, certainly not shy and tend to say and do things I normally wouldn't. My thoughts seem to go in every direction.

Proving these now said facts I opend my big mouth.

"Do you like me?"

"What?"

"Do you like me?" I asked again louder.

Jay paused for a moment.

"Yeah I do."

"Are you gonna ask me out?"

"Your out with me today aren't you?" he answered teasing.

I rolled my eyes and slumped back in my seat.

"You know what I mean."

A couple minutes passed by, neither of us saying anything.

"Jay.."

"Huh?"

"I want something."

"Like what."

I paused for a moment thinking. Should I say what's on my mind?

"I want to be your girlfriend." I blurted out.

The car came to a stop.

"We're here." Jay said and he got out of the car without answering my question.

I stayed in my seat. Feelings of insecurity and doubt filling my mind. I shouldn't have told him that. He's probably wishing that he had brought someone else now. God, I'm so stupid.

My door opend and Jay extended his hand.

"Come on babe, let me help you."

Sighing I took his hand and carefully got out of the car. My body swayed a little and I had to gather all my stength to stay standing. Jay held onto my hand and put the other firmly around my waist.

"Maybe I drank a little too much." I said as a rush of giggles followed.

Jay couldn't help but chuckle himself. "Yeah, just a little."

As soon as I got my bearings I looked around. We were down by the river. The old shops were cluttered and mixed together. Here you could find a bar next to an antique shop. The tall concrete flood wall was covered with old artwork and graffiti.

"We should go down to the water." I told him, cuddling up against his side as he moved me away from the door so he could shut it.

"Maybe later." He said. "We've got people to see first."

I giggled again loudly as we began to walk down the busy parking lot.

"Your going to have to be quiet or people are going to suspect something." He told me in a harsh wisper.

I flinched a little at his tone.

How dare he get me drunk and then treat me like a child!

I pulled away from him to walk on my own and he could tell that something was wrong. He came around to stand in front of me and I stopped. Tears of frustration and hurt welling up in my eyes.

I looked down willing myself not to cry. He lifted my chin with one hand.

"Taylor, look at me."

I did as he said hoping he wouldn't see my tears.

"Awww honey I'm sorry."

A tear fell and rolled down my cheek and he reached up and gently brushed it away.

"I'm sorry if I hurt you." he said softly. "But, we can't have people thinking something is up. We're just a couple meeting up with some friends. Nothing else."

I just nodded my head and gave him a small smile. "Ok."

His face lit up. "Your beautiful when you cry." he told me brushing a wisp of hair out of my face. I thought my heart would beat out of my chest.

Such a crazy relationship we had. Harsh one moment and caring the next. As he leaned over and kissed me I decided that right here in this moment, everything was perfect.

We stood there in each others arms for a minute or so and then we began to walk again.

We had to find Martin.