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BiAnIcole

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"okay now keep your foot on the brake as you put the car into drive" HAHAHA THAT WOULD BE DANDY IF I KNEW WICH ONE WAS THE BRAKE

"ummm which one?" i asked looking at the two petals beneath my feet

" the long horizontal one that's closet to your left foot" as he said this i looked down and sure enough the long horizontal one was closet to my left foot, i pushed down on the brake and slowly clicked down into drive

"okay good now slowly, and i mean slowly take your foot off the break"

i did as i was told and the car started to lurch forward

i freaked a little bit " alright alright what next"

he looked over at me grinning " your fine but keep your eyes on the road"

i looked forward "mhm"

"alirght now when you feal like you have the steering under control you can lightly step onto the gas"

i nervously looked down at the gas jezz i was already going to fast for myself but i decided agianst my better judgement and started to apply the gas,okay okay not bad.

i was going atleast 10 miles an hour in the beach parking lot, there was no one around so chris chose this spot to show me and teach me how to opperate the car.

"pretend as though all the white lines are a road and this side is on coming traffic- i want you to turn left here" i began to turn as he said " you know you totally just killed us"

"what are you talking about?" i asked slamming on the break

"i told you that this side of the road was oncoming traffic and you just crossed over and killed us" he said motioning to the place in front of us.

i turnt to glare at him but he was smiling, jesus christ!

"you shouldnt frown it makes you that much cuter and i dont think i can refrain from kissing you aigian"

i smiled i wouldnt mind kissing chris agian and im thinking now ive never really seen him like this " who's stoping you" i said glaring at chris agian

his smiled widened " are you -" i cut him off by leaning over and kissing him he responded a little late but seconds later we were tangled into each other so i turnt to feel him better

my mistake!

i acidentally took my foot off the break and it was still in drive and i didnt realize it before we were like 2 feet from the water! chris freaked out!

"hit the brake hit the brake" but i was way to slow he pulled up the emergency brake .

he was breathing heavy and looking really annoyed

"you drive me crazy?" i shrugged smiling innocently

"put the car in park, now" he said undoing his seatbelt

i did as i was told " so this is the end of my driving lesson huh?" i asked

"for now, we need to talk tay" he said turning in his seat to look at me

i was about to open my mouth to protest when his phone began to ring.

he grunted lifting his but off the seat so he could slide his phone out of his front pocket.

"sarah this is kinda a bad time" sarah was his older sister who was married with kids and chris didnt hear from that often " what?" suddenly i felt my stomach jerk as i saw his expression twist up like he was about to cry but only for a second then his expression showed nothing but emptiness.

"mhm im still here" he said his voice was hard "alright, i'll be there in a little bit" he said slowly then listen for a minute before closing his phone.

he just stared straight ahead saying nothing, this was really scaring me. never in my whole life of knowing chris had i seen his face without a smile or any known expression to what he was feeling.

after what felt like forever he sighed running a hand over his face "tay, i gotta drop you home" he said turning to me for a minute he resisted from somthing then he let it out "my dad passed away this morning" i felt a pang in my chest as chris looked away from me down at his lap as if embaressed with his hands lying limply at his sides. when chris was little his mother left him, his older sister sarah, and his father without a word or any reason of why. after sarah had gotten married and moved out of the house when chris was only 13 and not soon after his father was diagnosed with lukemia, thats when chris went to live with my father and brothers cause he certaintly couldnt take care of his father and himself at the same time.

before i could digest this he stared up the engine and began to drive me home.

he dropped me off in silence and i knew as much as i said somthing to him either that i was sorry or things would get better i know it didnt help any so i just kept my mouth shut.

it felt like hours until i heard the front door open and then slam shut, i was seated in the front living room watching the lifetime channel, i got up quickly and rushed to the front door only to be greated by a very angry tom.

"where in gods name have you been? why wasnt chris there when he was supposed? and where is he with my car now?" he yelled looking around like chris would pop up out of nowhere with his car.

"tom you need to calm down somthing happened" i stopped i wasnt sure if it was my place to tell tom about chris's father but that would the only way to calm him down

"what do you mean somthing happened?! he didnt wrech my car or get arrested did he?!" he said through gritted teeth

"god no tom jesus would you give chris more credit than that! he got a phone call from his sister telling him his dad passed away this morning!" i said my voice rising

tom look taken aback as though i had slapped him or somthing, the he looked shamefully down at the floor.

"oh man, when did he get the call?"

"about 1:00, we were on our way home" my voice quiter now.

tom mumbled somthing under his breath while he took off into the kitchen.

i didnt need to sit around for any of this so i procceeded down the long hallway to my tucked in part of the house.

now i had the rest of today and tomorrow to past time. so flopped on my bed and was fast asleep.

*********************

when i woke up the numbers on my clock were blaring 2:15AM

i was kinda confused about why i had woken up so early but as the sleepyness wore off it all came back to me; chris.

i got up out of bed really unsure of where i was going until i reached chris's door and entered somthing totally unknown.

when i reached the bottom of the steps the room was completely lit i looked around at first i didnt see anyone.

until i saw chris huddled in the corner barebacked going threw somthing. all of a sudden i felt dorky and stupid standing there in my pajamna pants and matching tank top so i went to leave but i wasnt quick enough.

"tay?" he sounded so tired and out of it.

i turned around slowly facing chris in his usual no shirt and sweatpants "hi" i tried to smile

"what are you doing up so late?" he asked taking somthings off the floor and moving them into a box beside him.

"i really dont know i just woke up out of nowhere" i said becoming slightly self concious as he stared at me

"well you seemed pretty much in a dead sleep when i checked on you earlier" he said standing up straight moving over to his bed

"oh" i said absently " when did you get home?" i asked

"around twelveish" he said proping himself agianst a pillow

for some reason i felt extremely cold then "oh" i started to fell a little wierd now.

"come here" he said patting the mattress

i did, i crawled onto the bed right next to him.

looking at him made my stomach twist and looking into his eyes i saw that sadness and i felt it too. he seemed at that moment his weakest and he was letting me see. he slid down a little in the bed wrapping his arms around my waist and his head into my chest, i didnt know what to do at first but then it came naturally i wrapped my arms around his shoulders and kissed his forhead.

"taylor, please stay with me tonite"

and this time he needed me and i wasnt about to leave him

"as long as you want me here" and as i said this his grip tightened around my waist and i could feal his shoulders relax and he pressed himself the rest of the way agianst me.

i wasnt sure when i fell asleep but i knew i stayed like that forawhile listening to his steady breath and remembering his touch.