Talking to the Rain

Heavy emptiness overwhelms me...
Lightheadedness clouds my thoughts... 
Happiness causing pain, 
Yet pain leads to happiness in me. 

I can't think, or sleep, and hardly even breathe. 
My mind is set on something I may not be able to have, 
And yet it bounces from one guilty pleasure to an unreachable delight. 
And so now in my life two men I weave and unweave 

So that I may find something to keep me happy. 
But there's nothing to do that, 
But the one I can't have. 
Everything else is so unsatisfactory. 

Someone to talk to, not there. 
Someone to be close to, too far away. 
Unreachable, unattainable.
The only one to really care. 

My thoughts can't be explained, 
My heart feels so restrained. 
A sigh of relief, or a sigh of  pain?
And now all I'm left with is talking to the rain.