A lost friend

so many thoughts at once,

nobody to talk to,

who can i trust?

nobody, that's who.

i'm alone

surrounded by people and i'm the only one there.

you don't know how i feel.

don't pretend you understand.

don't say you know how i feel,

don't try to, either.

my face is constantly draped with tears,

but you can't see.

your eyes are blind to my constant suffering.

i love him,

i love him not,

i hate her,

wait, what?

what's going on here?

i don't even know.

how can you, if i don't?

you lie.

since day one.

every word,

every sentence,

every smile,

every hug,

it was all a lie.