Who am I?(Why?)

My hand quivering
With sorrow and guilt
My friend full of rage
My heart heavy and falling
But who am I to speak aloud?
Who am I to step out of place?
Who am I to say what I think,
Before I even know what to think?
My life slowly draining
I care for it no more
Why does this guilt comsume me so?
Why did I have to speak?
Why did I have to love the unloveable?
Why am I alive?
This is not happening
I dont want to live
This is not true
I can't stand myself
Tell me God
Oh mighty God
Why...