Sad Life

She was talking nonsense
She was talking about some D.S.S
She said she had to tell someone
She said she must confess

She said that she was sorry
but i would have to go away
She said she would get better
and come back for me one day

Mom was sorry that she hit me
And mom told me not to tell
Mommy was screaming
But she was crying as well

She hugged me and said she was a bad mom
I just cried and told her no
I said she was a good mom
Mommy just don't let me go

She said moms aren't supposed to hit
that it just isn't right
she said kids were supposed to fell safe
and not be afraid in the night

Why cant life be good again
like it used to be
Why does mommy drink so much
is it because of me?

The doctors said it was a disease
I wish they would find a cure
if she wasn't sick with alcoholism
Everything would be good again for sure

Mommy is nice when she don't drink
but that is hardly ever
Every-time she gets drunk
she'll hit me, then not remember

When she hit me ALL i felt was sad
as we tried to cover up the marks on my face
i did not feel angry or ashamed
and i did not feel like a disgrace

I thought my mom would always love me
no matter how bad things got
We understand each other
and that says a lot

But she didn't want to lose her little girl
she thought life would be better
if she ended it all
Just said goodbye in a suicide letter