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concrete

Views (785) Worry Created on 11-20-06 Flag

the paved and poisoned land, the light and dark grains of sand, the worn down scraps of hassled men, recieve what we neglect, yet again.

the sallow grin of a benevolent being, is an obvious reason for health colored green.

and death rolls beneath me, life gathers within, and all of the sadness heaven see's we tend to begin

while absent children defy to be taught, an aimless carbon copied adult is wrought, lost to the element kindness forgot, with a worth that is never redeemed nor sought!

the opposites of our progress, leave a privacy for the theories to undress

and this circle will arrow on again, to pass to enemies and teach to friends

because will not relent-in- paving and poisoning the land

 

 

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On October 4th 2007 kgrf101 Said :
kgrf101 This poem is very unique!
On October 3rd 2007 georgiastockwe Said :
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WHEN U R READING THIS DONT STOP OR SOMETHING BAD WILL HAPPEN MY NAME IS SUMMER I AM 15 YEARS OLD i have BLONDE HAIR , SCARS no NOSE OR EARS I AM DEAD IF U DONT COPY THIS JUS LIKE FROM THE RING COPY N POST THIS ON 5 MORE SITES OR I WILL APPEAR ONE CREEPY NIGHT WEN UR NOT ExPECTING IT BY YOUR BED WITH A NIFE AND KILL U THIS IS NO JOKE SUMMET ING GOOD WILL HAPPEN TO U IF YOU POST THIS ON 5 MORE FLASH BOXES
On July 16th 2007 bonita1510 Said :
bonita1510 i really like this poem u should go to muh page and check out muy poems thankyou
On May 6th 2007 christopher199 Said :
christopher199 really good agree its very creative
On March 20th 2007 J6mind Said :
J6mind whoa very creative very poetic now that's a real poem!!!
On March 18th 2007 limesour69 Said :
limesour69 u know this is truely amazing work. i like how u used your words. deep, i really like it. we are our own undoing.
On March 15th 2007 truth8607 Said :
truth8607 its like a beautiful song sung with no vocal cords amaising but never been done im a fan
On March 5th 2007 rellcinko Said :
rellcinko i like it
On March 5th 2007 timmietha Said :
timmietha i like this a lot. thanks for your comments too, your amazing
On February 21st 2007 shielsy18 Said :
shielsy18 this poem is structed really well adding in depth, its got a good build up. i think it could be pushed longer. but great job
On February 15th 2007 ralicia Said :
ralicia Your words are well used for the purposes of getting a well thought out point across. I like!
On February 12th 2007 19Superman88 Said :
19Superman88 WOW I ALWAYS WANTED TO KNOW HOW TO WRITE GOOD POEMS
On January 31st 2007 noname14 Said :
noname14 this is good. I like the rhyming of it... very creative and descriptive. You are a really good poet! ~Chelsea
On January 1st 2007 joshattack Said :
joshattack i like this a lot, whether or not i believe in your take on it. But that's because i see some religious aspects to this, and i'm the wrong person to have any real insight into that. It is very well written though, and i enjoyed reading it.
On December 12th 2006 hotpants21 Said :
hotpants21 i like this one and the way it rhymes.
On December 12th 2006 vivikan07 Said :
vivikan07 i like this poem
On December 9th 2006 quaizzi Said :
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I like it, I dont know what else to say, but I definitely like it
On December 5th 2006 500nets Said :
500nets thats a very odd thing to say after my poem peter, but i like it, anyone who reads this needs to go check out peters last poem
On December 1st 2006 cocopuff2005 Said :
cocopuff2005 Good :)
On November 28th 2006 lookapenguin Said :
lookapenguin Pretty good ^.^
On November 28th 2006 500nets Said :
500nets damn somebody rated me down, i wish i knew who it was so i could read their poetry
On November 22nd 2006 punkgrlonly4u Said :
punkgrlonly4u i really like this poem
On November 20th 2006 babeabeez Said :
babeabeez very creative.
On November 20th 2006 500nets Said :
500nets sorry the last line was supposed to be "because aimlessness will not relent-in- paving and poisoning the land