Raped by a 21 year old

I was only 14 and he was 21 years old

I was begging him to stop.

It hurted so bad...but all he keep on saying was "Dont worry it will be okay"

I was so blind to see that I was actually a toy for him....

So I keep my mouth shut...

After a while I felt discusted, and wanted to tell someone....

But I was afraid of wat else he would do to me...

I knew he had his baby mother...

I knew that he was lieing  when  he said he loves me....

But I was to young and scared to let my mom now...

He keep on using me and hurting me  till one day I told him I was 3 months far....

That was the last day I seen him....

My belly wasnt noticesable...so  no one knew....

A month later one of his friend punched me around 10 times on my belly the next thing you know no more baby....

some times I thank God for that because themy baby boy or girl is better on with him....but sometimes I think about how would it been if I would have had it?

now I feel so ashamed of my self.....I feel embaraced.....to know that I  was raped by a 21 year old.....