Penis Job Application

• I do physical labor
• I work at great depths
• I plunge head first into everything I do
• I do not get weekends off or public holidays
• I work in a damp environment
• I don?t get paid overtime
• I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation
• I work in high temperatures
• My work exposes me to contagious diseases

Dear Penis,

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

• You do not work 8 hours straight
• You fall asleep on the job after brief work period
• You do not always follow the orders of the management team
• You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit other areas
• You do not take initiative. you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working
• You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift
• You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing
• You'll retire well before reaching 65
• You're unable to work double shifts
• You sometimes leave your allocated position before you have completed the day's work. And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the workplace carrying 2 suspicious looking bags.

Sincerely,

The Management