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***GOT GAS?***

Views(3247) Created(5-4-07) Category ( Dirty )

This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years. The only friction in there marriage was the husband's habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air. Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick.

He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor, she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out. The years went by and he continued to rip them out!

Then one Thanksgiving morning, as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver, and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.

Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good.

About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained underpants with a look of horror on his face.

She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter.
He said, "Honey, you were right. All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you."
"What do you mean?" asked his wife.
"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened. But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and two fingers, I think I got most of them back in."

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On June 21st 2008 nickynicole901 Said :
nickynicole901 ewww
On June 15th 2008 BlueZooMaTan Said :
BlueZooMaTan NASTY!!! but funny!
On April 20th 2008 beachbum8706 Said :
beachbum8706 omg..lol
On November 28th 2007 bambambaby1000 Said :
bambambaby1000 WHEN U R READING THIS DONT STOP OR SOMETHING BAD WILL HAPPEN MY NAME IS SUMMER I AM 15 YEARS OLD i have BLONDE HAIR , SCARS no NOSE OR EARS I AM DEAD IF U DONT COPY THIS JUS LIKE FROM THE RING COPY N POST THIS ON 5 MORE SITES OR I WILL APPEAR ONE CREEPY NIGHT WEN UR NOT ExPECTING IT BY YOUR BED WITH A NIFE AND KILL U THIS IS NO JOKE SUMMET ING GOOD WILL HAPPEN TO U IF YOU POST THIS ON 5 MORE FLASH BOXES
On October 6th 2007 jazzbabe5 Said :
jazzbabe5 lmao i love this joke its sad that he did that though. men should definitely consider listening more often but not acting so quickly...sometimes.
On August 23rd 2007 missbody07 Said :
missbody07 daymn
On August 20th 2007 Joanakathleen Said :
my picture
O MY GOD!!
On August 18th 2007 mzbrwn123 Said :
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good and mischievious
On August 17th 2007 sarabeara11 Said :
sarabeara11 original though. =]
On August 17th 2007 sarabeara11 Said :
sarabeara11 lmao ewwwwwwwww
On August 13th 2007 Cutepinkie13 Said :
Cutepinkie13 naaaasty....burph
On July 20th 2007 spymaster1026 Said :
spymaster1026 that was nasty and funny i dont know if i should laugh or blow chunks
On July 14th 2007 JoshPartin Said :
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ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
On July 6th 2007 00sunday Said :
00sunday eww that is soooooo wrong
On May 28th 2007 daveyloveX Said :
daveyloveX ahh god.. than gnarly.. lol but its funny