THINGS THAT HALLMARK CARDS DON'T S

Views(568)

Created(5-10-08)

Category ( Lists )

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My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat

When I looked at the tire...

I noticed your cat.

Sorry!
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Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be.

But don't fret about it...

She moved in with me.

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Looking back over the years
that we've been together,

I can't help but wonder...

"What the hell was I thinking?"

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Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.

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How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?

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I've always wanted to have
someone to hold,

someone to love.

After having met you ..

I've changed my mind.

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Imust admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.

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As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.

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Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...

Would you like to take this knife out of my back?

You'll probably need it again.

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Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
(Available only inTennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia)

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Happy birthday! You look great for your age.
Almost Lifelike!

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When we were together,
you always said you'd die for me.

Now that we've broken up,

I think it's time you kept your promise.

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We have been friends for a very long t ime ..
let's say we stop?

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I'm so miser able without you
it's almost like you're here.

=====================================================

Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?

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Your friends and I wanted to do
something special for your birthday.

So we're having you put to sleep.

))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day.

Look at the bright side,

it's really good pay.

Please Login to post comments

On May 28th 2008 deb729 Said :

	lol....funny

On May 22nd 2008 DNAte9959 Said :

	You should have arranged them so the first letters of each word say something...

On May 12th 2008 N5607 Said :

	HAHAHA, fantasticness XD

On May 12th 2008 tigerbaby7644 Said :

	haha these made me laugh

On May 12th 2008 geli01 Said :

	uncle dad .... lmao . once this girl was being a butt to us and so i said , "go screw ur mom/cousin." its was funny >D

On May 12th 2008 chickp96 Said :

	heheh that's funny

On May 12th 2008 babybones420 Said :

	wow thats great

On May 12th 2008 Hudsonluv44 Said :

	This is hilarious.... my favorite was the last one.... i laughed really hard....

On May 12th 2008 MCRsLover Said :

	haha

On May 11th 2008 rosebrugh Said :

	i haven'teither and they are really good

On May 11th 2008 ashleyandaudel Said :

	No I havnt heard any of those lol

On May 11th 2008 ashleyandaudel Said :

	No I havnt heard any of those lol

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