Hell no!!

One day, while her husband was at work, a very bored wife decided she wanted to spice up their sex life. She went to the store, bought crotchless underwear, candles and all the makings for a romantic and dirty evening.

When her husband came home home from work, she was waiting for him in bed, wearing nothing but the crotchless underwear. 

When he walked into the bedroom, she flung the blanket aside exposing herself and said,

"You want some of this, stud?"

He looked at her for a short moment, then replied,

"Hell no, look what it did to your underwear!"