true blonde jokes

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who broke her leg raking leaves?

A: She fell out of the tree.

Q: How do you kill a blonde?

A: Put a "Scratch 'n Sniff" sticker at the bottom of a pool.

Two blondes walk into a bar.... you would have thought one of them would see it.

A blonde and a brunette decide to start and ranch and they need to buy a bull, so the brunette goes around tryin to find a bull. She finds one the next state over and buys it, then she wants to send a telegram to her partner to tell her to bring the truck and trailer to get the animal. The telegram company said it would be one dollar per word, she reaches in her pocket to discover she only has one dollar left. The brunette thinks for a moment and says, send this message, "Comfortable." The guy was confused and she explained, "My partner's blonde, so she'll read it "com for ta bull"

A red head and blonde decide to rob the bank, the red heads gonna be the getaway car driver, and as she pulls in front of the bank she says, "OK, are you SURE you don't need to go over the plan again?" The blonde assured her that she knew the plan and got out. The red head is sittin in the car for about 45 minutes wondering what is taking so long, finally the blonde comes out the door dragging the safe by a rope. A few seconds later the guard comes staggering out with his pants around his ankles. The red head yells out the window "YOU IDIOT, I TOLD YOU TO TIE UP THE GUARD, AND BLOW THE SAFE!"

A blonde is driving and it starts to hail really bad, her car gets all dented up so the next day she decides to take it to the mechanics. The mechanic, seeing she was a blonde, decided to have some fun with her, she asked him if he could get the dents out and he said, "Oh, that's easy, you can do that yourself." "I can?" she asked, "Oh sure" he replied, "all you gotta do is go home, get behind the car, and blow really hard into the tail pipe, and the dents will just pop out." So she goes home and gets on her hands and knees and starts blowing just as hard as she can. While she's doing this her roomate (another blonde) comes home and asks what she's doing. "I'm trying to pop the dents out of my car but it's not working," she explained. "You idiot," her roomate said, "you gotta roll the windows up first."

A red head was driving down a country road in Ireland, she sees a shepherd out tending his flock, she pulls over and goes up to him. "Excuse me sir, if I can guess how many sheep you have, can I keep one?" Knowing she'll never get the answer right, he agrees. She thinks a moment and says "239." Amazing, the shepherd thought, that was EXACTLY how many sheep he had. "Well, you were right, go ahead and pick one out." She goes and finds the softest, fluffiest sheep she can find and carries it to her car. He follows her up and says, "Ma'am, if I can guess your true hair color, can I have my dog back?"