Chuck Norris Jokes

Views(9716)

Created(8-17-06)

Category ( Chuck )

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost

Please Login to post comments

On June 29th 2008 The0Muffin0Man Said :

	Some of these jokes were read by him on TV someone posted it as a joke

On June 20th 2008 babooshka1359 Said :

	sweet@

On June 12th 2008 sorrow95 Said :

	AWESOME!!!!!!!

On June 2nd 2008 toriayla16 Said :

	the revolving doors cracked me up!!

On May 17th 2008 futureguy95 Said :

	i love the waldo on... that made my day

On May 9th 2008 Bree1013 Said :

	thats chuck norris.

On April 21st 2008 laurita2010 Said :

	who the fuck is chuck norris

On April 9th 2008 beckagurly Said :

	LUV CHUCK! FEAR HIM!

On April 8th 2008 dunner007 Said :

	all are awesome!!

On March 30th 2008 EvilBonez17 Said :

	Damn I'm literally laughing so hard I'm crying LMAO!

On March 24th 2008 UnSane420 Said :

	i'm in tears they are so funny

On March 21st 2008 barrylchik Said :

	chuck norris is awsum

On February 22nd 2008 kuzzn43 Said :

	this is stupid and he would never stand up to bruce -lee he doesnt have the power ha ha

On January 31st 2008 JDanielW Said :

	Some people wear Superman pajamas, Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

On January 25th 2008 rabbit0014 Said :

	I like the one with Waldo lol

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